the aftermath of my sister's marriage left me feeling so empty. it's so surreal, someone who's always been there for me now gone. granted we were never the closest of siblings as closeness goes but at least she was there in person and i could just walk over to talk to her about the most mundane and inane stuff. now she's gone.

living in some box in toa payoh and hopefully starting her own family soon. they say she's not gone, only married but what's the difference. she's not going to be here. i believe the impact on my parents are worst, especially for my dad.

mommy's boy and daddy's girl. i swear i saw tears in my father's eyes when my sis signed the wedding cert.

Women

another reason why women have a terrible sense of direction

upon seeing the NEWLY BUILT saint andrew's village BY promptly shouted ," AYE IT'S SAJC!"

ME, " YEAH..."

BY, " THAT MEANS WE ARE NEAR IKEA!"

ME, " erm... "

Workshop

I hate workshops. they are greasy, dusty and dirty. what's worst? the part where u have to do ur own maintaince. fucking sucks. i got there almost an hour late. why? cause somebody told me it was industrial park C, when it was actually industrial park E. fucking hell. and i repeatedly asked whether it was industrial park e. let me give u an example," hey i cannot find C leh..." fucker," ur at where now?" me," i'm at INDUSTRIAL PARK E." fucker," which one?" me," E, E FOR ELEPHANT. GOT WHICH ONE MEH?" fucker," yeah, look for C One then correct."

at this point i think he meant E1... but...

finally after an hour i reached the workshop where i promptly began servicing my car, changing the engine oil, the transmission fluid, the air fliter and lastly, the mother fucking bloody damming timing belt. somebody dropped the screw and we spent the next 1 hour looking for the god damned screw. screw the screw just get me a new one for crying out loud.

i finally screwed in the screw, it was in some god forsaken crevice in the engine compartment. the engine compartment... i'm amazed with mechanics. they have holes there so small, even an unerected penis would have trouble entering... my goodness. plus it's so dark there, choosing a hole to stick it into is even worst. u choose a nice place to dig and then wala, u get pricked by a sharp object, never mind, u choose another hole and u enter, so far so good. UNTIL u touch something that is damn bloody fucking hot. like WHO'SURDADDY hot. when i was repairing it i felt as if i was playing russian roulette.

but it was good. my car feels faster, it feels smoother and it seems less petrol guzzling now... but i tink it's psychological. another thing i hate about repairing cars... u get to know what ELSE is broken.. like fucking hell...

as of now, i need to change the pulley system that controls the air con and who knows what else... apparently each wheel has this cover on the inside of the car that contains grease... right now one of them is broken and i have to change it. it does not seem like a simple job... i need to rotate my tires, ie, change the front tires to the rear and the rear tires to the front. this is due to the simple fact that 1, the front tires are worn out while the rear tires are almost brand new. 2, i do not have money to just change to a brand new set. and apparently yokohoma tires are lousy... no one has anything good to say about my car...

at least the servicing was cheap granted that it was done by urs truely.

let me tell u a joke, a real life one. KK is a jc teacher of mine, he was a bastard and we all hope he dies. anyways, VIC," i heard he's (KK) in japan now." me, " hope he goes ard screwing jap girls and gets aids." VIC," yah yah! that bastard, say i got parkinson's disease... I HOPE HE GET AIDS, THE ONE THAT CANNOT CURE ONE!"

there was an akward silence in the car after she said that... and somebody went, "AIDS IS NOT CURABLE RIGHT...?" (dripping with sacarism.)

VIC, very sheepishly," yah... i meant i hope he doesnt get cured."

after a while, " nono, i mean i hope he gets aids and that aids is not curable."

"by the time he gets it till he dies at least."

i am trying...

i slept at 2 and i woke at 530. i'm thinking it's the withdrawal symptoms... my nose is super stuck, it's running so fast it can most definately break UK SHYAM's national record for the 100 m.

i wish i can go back to sleep and at least, at the very least get some more sleep. they say the 3 day mark is the hardest, it's the hardest to get to but once u cross the 3 day mark, the rest is easy.1 more day to the 3 day mark, someone please grant me the strenght. it's funny how they say exercise to help u get more energy when ur trying to quit. i've been doing that and it IS working. in fact, everytime after i finish exercising, the urge to smoke is repulsive. haha, i guess it MUST be true somehow.

think of all the money u'll save they say, i just got my handphone bill and i'm convinced, there will always be other outlets or my money to miraculously disappear. it's just where it goes to but it always goes somewhere other than my own pocket.

all in all, my mouth feels .... erm... cleaner? haha

Mosquito

me when asked to give a speech during my sister's wedding,


" i'll feel like a mosquito at a nudist beach. i know what i have to do but i wouldn't know where to start."

I Forgot

she speaks korean and romanian as well : samsung and kimchi, numa numa aye....

She Speaks

my friend is multilingual

she speaks japanese : sashimi, wasabi, tempura, sayonara etc etc

she speaks indian too : murtebak, prata etc etc

she speaks malay : roti, nasi lemak, nasi goreng, mee goreng and malaysia boleh

she speaks chinese (she's chinese) : wan ton mee, mee pok and ni hao

she speaks english : long john silvers, macdonalds, burger king and carl's junior

HOMM AGAIN

if i were a hero living in the world of HOMM and world conquest is my full time job. i would be a necromancer. yes, a necromancer. nothing beats killing fighting a battle and turning a portion of ur slain enemies into your own mindless and souless undead army. granted, u might not gain the benefits of good moral but at least u do not have to worry about low moral. u can raid the tombs of every single dead hero with fear of the repecussions that it is going to have on the moral of your troops.

let me have the cloak of the undead and the armour of the damned as well. it is always good to raise 80% of your slain enemies instead of a measly 20%, do the math and you'll see the power of compounding in the long run.

if i ever get sick of being evil, i could always be a wizard, mage or druid. as long as i am able to use magic. i cannot grasp the concept of playing this game as a babarian, with their total disregard of the importance of magic and prefering to i quote," rely on tatics and battle strategies". i mean if u can rely on tatics and battle strategies, a mage could also rely on tatics and battle strategies BUT they have the added advantage of MAGIC. mass slow, mass bless, chain lighting and implosion can seriously change the face of the battle. if ur talking about turning the tables then magic is the way to go.

on the world map, town portal, flight and water walking can make me the most versatile general in the field. who cares if u can walk 1.5 times as far as me. i could go up a mountain, through a river or simple teleport back to my castle and see if u have the balls to come knocking on my door. i could fly over the alps like hannabal and appear at the doorstep of your undefended castle when u think you've sealed me up JUST BECAUSE U'VE BLOCKED THE ONLY PATH WITH AN ARMY THAT I CANNOT DEFEAT. and then u've got to give up ur plans of attacking me JUST because u've lost ur castle. sucker.

never underestimate the power of archers. i can shoot off a the balls of a man at 500 paces. translates to if i have 500 archers i can shoot of the balls of 500 men at 500 paces, 500 men at 450 paces, 500 men at 400 paces and 500 men at 350 paces and so on so forth. by the time you are 50 paces to me, you would have lost 4500 men to my pathetic 500 archers. talk about economies of scale.

another flaw i've noticed is that people tend to build buildings to produce creatures 1st. please, u can have all the damn creatures in your castle and it will not make a damn difference if u do not have the money to recruit them. it's like buying stocks. u can have all the best planned portfolios on the world but if u aint got the dough, u aint going to make the bread.

if i were a hero in HOMM, i would make adelide my 1, wife 2, consort 3, mistress 4, lover 5, anything which means she is mine.

her profile, "brought up on the something to do with ice and winter, her specialilty of frost ring. "(frost ring is a spell.) btw she's a human cleric, which means it would get a little tough if i were necromancer. never mind. i'll just turn her into a vampire or maybe a mindless zombie to do all my biddings. *perverted laughter*

*more perverted laughter*

DUN GO SLEEP RIGHT AFTER YOU EAT!

my dog was trying not to fall asleep after dinner, there she was, lying on the floor in a semi state of bliss.




"MON! DUN GO AND SLEEP RIGHT AFTER YOU EAT!"


she jumped up after suffering a near heart attack. and ran around completely disorientated. deciding that the enemy was outside the house, she ran out and started barking who knows what to god knows who.

at least i got the bitch moving.

Pro-love

the babarian crag hack is victorious. now it's time for yog the half genie half babarian to break free of the iron fist of the wizards and answer his true calling. that of a babarian!

of course it's not as easy as it seems. there's always titans to battle, grelims to flee from. if only life were as straight forward as it. oh, and i have to conquer a castle in 1 week.. sigh...

i was reading a text book and i came across this, Singapore's pubic service follows the latter practice. "the Civil Service is not only pro-marriage, it is also PRO-LOVE. ....... We encourage our SINGLE staff to SOCIALISE freely."

i never knew the gahmen was pro-love. and pro-love sounds wrong. it's so juvenile. when i read it i burst out laughing and laughing and laughing. i hope it comes out for the exams. it's the ONE thing i remember surely, fully and whole-heartedly.

i am looking forward to the hols. hopefully i will get my paycheck in. a cool whooping 1 k to blow in 1 month. if i do the maths that's $30 a day... not much now that i look at it. sigh.

HOMM

procrasination is my most powerful attribute. why do today what you can do tommorrow is my stand. there's always tommorrow. tommorrow will always come. accomplish not what you can accomplish tommorrow today.

the computer is the deadly accomplice of procrasination. just 5 more minutes to further aid my plans for world domination. 5 more minutes to bring me one step closer to the final showdown between the frost blade and amergadon's blade. gelu the eleven ranger has by brute force snatched/stole and robbed innocent people in order to create the elxir of life.

gem on the other hand, a mighty soccerous (wrong spelling i know) has found another calling, that of a druid. amazingly. druids can choose their own oaths so there's no conflict of interest here. meanwhile, she has been conned by sandro the necromancer to collect and give him various artifacts that aid necromancing skills. he claimed that he was doing anti necromancing researched, he just needed boots of the dead man, vampire's cowl and some other evil artifacts.

now with 2 campaigns down, i'm crag hack! who thinks that wizards are dumb because sandro called him MISTER hack. i quote," stupid wizards! they cant even get other people's 1st names right! it's CRAG hack not MISTER hack!" sandro the mastermind is engaging the services of this not too bright barbarian to capture more artifacts.

i've played this game before. and later on, there will be a final showdown, which will rip the world asunder and survivors will flee this world to a new world, thus, allowing 3DO to create a totally fresh and exciting universe. of course that game has been out for years and i've played that too.

BUT

this winter( i can never understand why singapore still uses this winter. don't they realise there's no winter in singapore) HEROES OF MIGHT AND MAGIC V will be out. WOO HOO!the graphics are amazing and the babes are hot. of course i'll be using the ice queen adelide again. sandro the necromancer is one of the nicer looking characters there. ivor the elven prince who has lost everything in the old world is back and boy would i love to use him. powerful artifacts such as the lion's shield, the unicorn bow, saints sandals will be back, I HOPE. this winter beware

THE HELL HOUND is back.

back to conquer the world, all in the name of justice and peace. of course that's before i move on to render my services to the forces of darkness and attempt to turn every living being into the living dead.

undead for laymans.

PINEAPPLE TARTS

my gf asked me if i wanted some pine apple tarts. i looked into the box and i could only see the pineapple jam...

confused, i asked her where were the tarts.

she looked at me and said, i dun like the jam, so i ate the dough and placed the jam back in the box.

FOR YOU TO EAT.

PENETRATION TEST

i had a beavis and butthead attack today. upon reading the term "PENETRATION TEST", i could not help laughing and smirking at the connotation.

penetration test.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

but penetration test... next i'll have a use my hand to do jobs. get it? HAND JOB.

ahahahaha

fuck, i'm going mad.

I HATE DRIVERS

i hate drivers who weave in and out of lanes
i hate drivers who stray into the adjacent lane without signalling
i hate drivers that suddenly zoom past me with a 5 cm gap
i hate drivers that speed up tp stop me from entering their lanes after i've signalled
i hate drivers that rog hog
i hate drivers that tailgate
i hate drivers that blast their music and then wind down their windows
i hate drivers that do not park within their lot
i hate drivers that zip into a parking lot when i've already signalled that i want that slot
i hate drivers that take forever to park

but most of all, i hate taxi drivers for all of the above and more.

All Tommorrow's Parties

And what costume shall the poor girl wear
To all tomorrow's parties
A hand-me-down dress from who knows where
To all tomorrow's parties
And where will she go, and what shall she do
When midnight comes around
She'll turn once more to Sunday's clown and cry behind the door

And what costume shall the poor girl wear
To all tomorrow's parties
Why silks and linens of yesterday's gowns
To all tomorrow's parties
And what will she do with Thursday's rags
When Monday comes around
She'll turn once more to Sunday's clown and cry behind the door

And what costume shall the poor girl wear
To all tomorrow's parties
For Thursday's child is Sunday's clown
For whom none will go mourning
A blackened shroud
A hand-me-down gown
Of rags and silks - a costume
Fit for one who sits and cries
For all tomorrow's parties

all tommorrow's parties - velvet underground

Editing

i was editing a report and i stumbled upon this error, "The staffs are constantly ...", "the staffs are etc etc..." this error was repeated significantly till i noticed it.

i then told my grp mate, " do u know it's one staff, many staff. not many staffS."

he looked at me and replied," my english not very good one. i type the staff is then got green line, i type staff are also got green line. so i changed to staffs are the don't have liao. so i changed all to staffs are."

spontaneous laughter broke out.

Asleep on a sunbeam... AGAIN

1st my laptop decided to disconnect from the internet.

next, it decided that it did NOT want to reconnect to the internet...

it kept up it's fucked up attittude by refusing all my attempts to reconnect to the internet. it refused my constant pleas as well as my constant clicking on "connect to wireless" commands. i was frustrated, i was helpless and i was desperate. i needed to go on the net so SF and PPS couls send me their files through either the email or msn.

but no, i just couldnt connect. what the fucking hell i must say.

sf and pps resigned to copying the files onto my thumb drive before passing it to me. just when i thought things couldnt get any worst, pps then sits upright and proclaims, " WAH! UR IBM SO GOOD HOR, DONT HAVE MEMORY STICK READER AH..."

dumbfounded and tired i queried, " what is a memory stick...?" (i wish to clear the air here, i do know what a memory stick is, i just forgot what it was at that time. it's called a memory lapse. i'm sure it happens to everyone.)

everyone ELSE bursted into spontaneous laughter... *sigh*

sf added to my misery by happily chirping," oh yah! and my apple can connect to the internet, ur (refer to pps) HP can connect to the internet! ONLY SOMEBODY'S THINKPAD CANNOT..."

she effectively nailed my coffin shut. air tight shut for that matter. i refused to comment, nothing was going to go right. it's just one of those days where no matter how hard u fight, u know you wll not win. yes, today was one of THOSE MISERABLE FUCKED UP HELPLESS DAYS. i was a lamb to the slaughter.

the meeting after that didnt seem to be much better, i was the butt of most of their jokes thanks to N. man... the things that can go wrong, u take 1 wrong step, it steadily gets bad, worst, terrible and simply horrible after that.

belle and sebastian rock. they rock so hard, if u were air and u listened to them, u'll solidify.

hur hur.

Asleep On A Sunbeam

Asleep On A Sunbeam - Belle and Sebastian

When the half light makes for a clearer view
Sleep a little more if you want to
But restlessness has siezed me now, it’s true
I could watch the dreams flicker in your eyes
Lying here asleep on a sunbeam
I wonder if you realise you fascinate me so

Think about a new destination
If you think you need inspiration
Roll out the map and mark it with a pin
I will follow every direction
Just lace up your shoes while I’m fetching a sleeping bag, a tent...

Another summer’s passing by
All I need is somewhere I feel the grass beneath my feet
A walk on sand, a fire I can warm my hands
My joy will be complete

I thought about a new destination
I’m never short of new inspiration
Roll out the map and mark it with a gin
Made my plans to conquer the country
I’m waiting for you to get out of your situation
With your job and with your life

All I need is somewhere I feel the grass beneath my feet
A walk on sand
A fire, I can warm my hands
My joy will be complete

A Thousand Apologies

some people have the knack for getting themselves into shit. more shit than they can ever imagine and they lose some, they win some. but they never seem to learn. or maybe they do learn but they're serverly lacking some sort of "trouble" detector. perhaps they're so adept at detecting trouble but they have the misconception that trouble is actually something good. perhaps they have the bestest intentions or sometimes no intentions at all but events take on a life of their own and spiral out of control, dumping the poor loser into shit again.

call it luck, bad judgement or perhaps one might think he did it on purpose. but who goes around looking for shit to takea bathe in.

Wasting Time

my friend had the most amazing dream last night. he dreamt that mon (my dog) could talk. apparently he was walking past my house and my dog ran out to greet him, he cant remember exactly what he said but he remembered that she ran up to him and started talking to him. then i sauntered to where they were and said, "GOOD DOG!".

end of story.

yesterday was going to be the 1st time i officially played truant. E and i spent like 30 mins deciding whether or not to go for class. if we were going to skip class where would we be going and what would we be doing. finally, when the time for lesson came, E looked at me and said, "lets go for class lah.". i blinked in disbelif. my heart skipped a beat and i said, "NOOOoooooo!!!!" the single longest, loudest no you can ever hear.

she stared at me and remarked that i was the one who told her to make a choice and now that she's made one, i do not want to follow it. bo bian, she said she'll choose again.

this time, she made the RIGHT choice.

as we were walking out of school, i made a remark that this was the 1st time this sem i was skipping class when i was in school. she said that it was her 1st too. man, were we excited. (i know it's nothing much but indulge me please.)

estatic, we began walking to suntec where we would then head to carls junior for a sumptous lunch. we walk and walk and talk and talk when E's hp began to ring. E started talking on the HP and from the tone of her voice and her body language i knew that it could only mean 1 thing.

we had to return to class.

there goes my carl junior lunch and my brillanto plan of studying during his lesson. the class had no electricity, at least the powerpoints for the laptops werent working. boy was i sad. my lappie died after a little while and i had nothing else to do except listen to unprepared groups do their presentation.sigh.

What Women Hear

read the november 3rd post in this blog. no doubt about who A is and definately no prizes for guesing correctly. this is a classic case of selective hearing.

for all the single guys out there, there is something here to be learnt. learn it well for i shall not spell it out for you.

and for the poor souls who are attached, god bless you and learn this well as well to prevent further descecration of your soul.

www.porkchopping.blogspot.com

disclaimer, this is NOT an accurate reflection of what happened that night and i am in no mood not guilty as charged to rebutt it. she can live in denial in the hole that she dug herself.

we all still love you. HAPPY?

What Type Am I?

check this out, quite lame but i got a good rating so i dun really care. http://www.cmi-lmi.com/enterppp.html

and iam a PRIME MINISTER. hahahaha.

your distinct personality, The Prime Minister might be found in most of the thriving kingdoms of the time. You are a strategist who pursues the most efficient and logical path toward the realization of the goal that you perceive or visualize. You will often only associate with those people who can assist you in the implementation of your plan. Inept assistants may be immediately discarded as excess baggage. To do otherwise could be seen as inefficient and illogical. On the positive side, you can be rationally idealistic and analytically ideological. You can be a bold decision maker and risk taker who can move society ahead by years instead of minutes. On the negative side, you may be unmerciful, impatient, impetuous and impulsive. Interestingly, your preference is just as applicable in today's corporate kingdoms.

Surveys

i hate doing surveys and i detest being the one conducting the survey. i hate approaching people and smiling at them when all i want is to kill 5 minutes of their lives. empty promises that it'll just take 5 mins of their time to complete it. who am i kidding. the book is some 40 pages long, granted it's single sided but still, it's too long.

why the hell am i doing a survey for burgers when the most feedback i get is that the survey is too long... they should have a survey for the ideal survey but then again, that just defeats the purpose of having the survey doesnt it. there's just quite no point as no one really wants to waste 5 to 10 mins of their lives doing a stupid fucked survey for macs. seriously, like who cares if a burger is too salty, or if the GOD DAMN FUCKING COMBINATION OF COLOURS OF VEGETABLES IS APPETISING OR NOT. i sure as hell do not and i'm cock sure that almost everyone else there doesnt. hell, people eat the burger without even notice what the fuck they are eating. most just go it was okay...

of course you'll meet the occasion old woman who is relatively still fuckable and quite nice to talk to and to my utter dismay, desperate? I KEED I KEED! but there was this 2 old women who were trying to strike up a conversation with me. they must be blind but then again, maybe they are just desperate. i mean who goes i come to macs once every 2~3 months and smiles. i smile back and say,"then i must be sure as hell lucky to meet you here don't you think?" she smiles back and says something completely out of this world like," haha! (coy smile) you must be pretty lucky to meet me here too. perhaps we should keep bumping into each other..." O.K. just freak me out. your age group says 25~29 but i believe, add at LEAST 5 to that number for a CLOSER age. i mean my sister is 27 and she looks 18. you look well, 36 and you claim to be 24 who's earning more than 5 k a month. 1, ur a genius and society really values your skills and you just happen to look old, thus the high pay at your young age. 2, you're old and shitting me. 3, you old and shitting me and trying to impress me with a 4 digit or above salary.

but okay, fine. i had another one where i was talking to her in english, reading the question in english and thinking in english. the only problem was she was talking to me in chinese. i mean what on earth was i thinking chatting her up in english when she was reading the bloody lian he zao bao. and my mind was so deeply entrenched in english thoughts that there was simply no way i could switch modes to chinese. i ended up compensating by say loads of lahs and mahs and hao bah. hao BAH. i hate saying that. that BAH word. don't ask me why, i just hate it. hao BAH. what the fucking hell. it's simply retarded.

and isnt the perfect combination for surveys a guy and a girl? so at least the guy can talk to the girls and the guys who the girl is afraid to approach while the girl can approach the guys and the girls that turn down her male partner. thus, creating a perfect sort of equilibrium where there is enough yin and yang power play. no such luck for me. my partner is in the mother fucking army. the cesspool for sex deprived, under aged and all things in a skirt is hot, thus i must chase it men. no i change. boys. he's like 19 and i'm like some kind of been there done that big brother. like hey, i dun think i can ask those people, you go leh... what a nice way to say why dun i take point and get myself totally and utterly humiliated. thank the lord above that thus far i've been lucky enough to not get turned down by the people i've approached so at least i've got some face left. maybe it's the pathetic eyes that i stare at them with, that melts their conviction and shatters their stoicness. sad to say, it works on aunties the best. but then again i comfort myself knowing that at least if i cant get anyone i could always be a pimp, though not too good looking a pimp at that. but it sure beats surveying.

i've smelt so much macdonalds i do not ever want to smell or taste another macdonalds burger again. it's simply repulsive. oh and i've been doing it for 6 hours. well done adrian, you are DA MAN MAN... in fact you are such a man, FOR ME TO POOP ON!

No Big Deal

Had an mpw interview and we borrowed a mp3 player cum recorder from a member of our group and I learnt a major lesson.

NEVER say mushy things into the player when you’re attempting to figure out whether it works or not. If you do do what I told you never to do, then at least have the decency to delete it. Imagine letting other people hearing your sweet nothings to ur significant other. Haha. How unsoundly.

Anyways, we were searching through the jungle of sound files in the mp3 player, trying to figure out which clip was the clip used during the interview and we heard this.

All this is in Chinese and is translated to English to the best of my significant abilities.

GF, “Start already!”

BF,” my girlfriend is very pretty.”

Okay, I didn’t need to hear that, though it’s no big deal. But still…

What The Fuck

i have had the most boring week of my life in school.

nothing's happening and nothing seems to be moving, there's nothing to do, nothing to look forward to and nothing to excite me or make me bitch. i must say, i am in bliss. full and total bliss. life has never been quieter. on hindsight, i've also realised that one can hear the most amazing and shocking things about people when you actually bother asking around.

and i am either dumb and naive or my sources are lying.

and walking together with my ah lian friend who some people seem to think is too funkily dressed or too attention attracting can provide some hard ass laughter. people just look at us, EXPAND their irsis and start gaping. it's hilarious. this is boring. sorry for putting you through this boring and mundane post. one must understand that i do not meet mother fuckers, bitches and bastards everyday.

neither do i talk to bimbos who have nothing better to reccomand than earth quake proof buildings in singapore. =) oh and i do not happen to be the only one who tinks so. so in this case, it's not just me.

okay, i do talk to many bimbos but they do not say bimbotic things that are worth repeating everyday. in fact, it is few and far between.

i just saw the dragon boaters run past me and i must say, they look FIERCE. like a bunch of abled bodied, testroone? pumping mucles. enshrouded under the cloak of darkness. boy of they look fit and strong. maybe it's my eyes, maybe they do look like they're ready to kill. and who better to be running in front than their awe inspiraing commando trained FL? haha. u know who u are. type the words back one space to the left. haha. boy do u rock. u make me wanna start running again. hahaha.

good thing i removed the tag board. at least now no one can reply. or at least ah, never mind. i do not wish to stir up yet another hornets nest. i'm ball-less, chicken and a scardy cat. bite me.
i'm shamless and without pride. lick my balls.

creative mp3 players rock. they just need better marketing. okay they suck. but if they had better marketing, they would be cool. hell. apple managed to make the shuffle look cool. how the hell is that remotely possible. that thing has no screen. limited buttons. and is such a cheap electronic piece of shit. and still it's selling like hot cakes. and the shuffle function is suddenly so cool. like what the fuck. what the hell. people invented the shuffle function like eons ago but everyone wanted a screen. everyone wanted to know what was playing. and now they launch something called the shuffle and suddenly it's OK to not know what ur listening to. it's OK to not have a screen. in fact, it's COOL to own a shuffle. btw, a shuffle costs less than $30 to manufacture. imagine the amount of profits they are reaping in.what the fuck.




what the fuck....









what the fucking hell.....

Conversations

conversation 1

me, " hey SF, ur top looks damn auntie leh. haha. where the hell did you get it from?"

SF, " it's my favourite! i love it! it's flamboyant!"

me, " uh huh... but it's really quite auntie looking. looks like something my mom wears..."

SF, " oh it's my moms' one..."

me, " now we're talking..."

conversation 2

me, " hey SF, ur damn hairy."

SF, " yeah but okay lah. no one can see."

me, " u look like sun wu kong."

SF, " yeah, u can pluck my hair, blow it and do the 72 transformations."

conversation 3

SF, "do u know this song?"

*silence*

me, " yeah it's called the song of silence. been hearing it for a long time. roughly 22 yrs."

SF, " wait."

akward silence




akward silence




more akward silence

SF," i forgot to press play. sorry..."

Yes, i know where it is. =)

Nothing Seems To Be Going Right

nothing seems to be going right. everything seems to be going wrong. i think it's time to go to church again, yes THAT TIME again. my only fear before i head into the doors again and sit on the pewters is that things usually get worst before they get better. it's as if things arent bad enough and by going to church, no doubt things will get better but they always get worst 1st and i do not want things to get worst.

another trend i've noticed is that when things are so bad and i dun wanna to go church anymore and i actually stop going, things get better. it's as if there's a delayed reaction between my actions and the result. instant gratification is what i'm looking for but i guess it's just not possible. why cant i be a good church going boy like so many of my friends... but then again, if i was than what's the fun in laughing at me saying this wouldnt have happened if i had continued going to church.

another thing i find odd about church, i know almost no one there but everytime i go there, everybody is so fucking friendly. it's like lo and behold, the return of the prodigal son. everyone says i look familiar and "welcome home", "may god guide you" blah blah blah. just leave me alone and fuck off bitch. i'm happy sitting by myself at the quiet corner where all the old folks are sitting. do not place me with the people my age, i have nothing in common with them and i do not intend to befriend them. if and when i go, it's because i want to, pure and simple.

i hate exercises where u have to look at ur neighbour to ur left and to your right, behind you and infront of you. no it doesnt end there, you have to smile you biggest bestest brightest smile and say, "GOOD MORNING! HOW DO U DO? I'M FINE THANK U!". cant they understand that not everyone goes to church to get to know more people, i go to church because i want to be in god's presence again. oh no, now i'm sounding like some mad assed preacher who ought to be shot, stoned and hanged.

i love the way they pass around the bags where you place ur money inside for donations. it's so nochalant so discreet, no one bothers whether i put any money inside or not. in fact, i could just take out a wad of notes and smile at myself after that but no. i do frown upon stealing.

i cannot stand the way they talk about burning damnation at some churches, they relate it back to money, money and more money. what u've got to give before u can receive. so people end up donating like 20% of their salary/ allowance etc etc. yeah, good and well. i might just give, should you shut the fuck up.

i love going church, more for the obscurity and sense of home that certain churches premates. but then again, it doesnt hold me for long, too many things pushing and pulling me away from church. i miss the days where i had compulsary monday chapel service. at least than i had a good reason to go and a bad reason not to...

i'm really sorry and i wish i could make it right. it was my bad but i swear to god that i never harboured any ill thoughts and i would rather lose a limb than do what you do not want me to do. it's not as if you do not know where i stand.

Nothing Seems To Be Going Right

WHAT-FUCKING-EVER

i just got back from the hospital, my grandma is warded, AGAIN. fuck my aunties and fuck that bastard. she fell down and her leg was swollen and they god damned made her to wash her own clothes that she had not completed washing. my dad wasnt at home so by de-fucking-fault i had to go down to their place. i've never cried since my grandpa passed away and i cried today. not exactly but tears were streaming down my face when i saw what i saw. i reached the hospital and my dad was tearing, i've seen him tear once and this was the 2nd time.

i cannot imagine him crying.

i hate this sense of helplessness, where there is nothing i can do. we want to take my grandma out of their place but it's just not going to happen. it's not gonna happen.

my uncle said that it's a disgrace, they have 8 siblings, 6 sons and no one can look after her. she's gonna die soon, so why not let her enjoy the rest of her life. she's old. she's sick and she's dying. at least let her enjoy what ever is left.

i see no point talking about the privacy of a blog. maybe i did stumble upon it and maybe someone gave it to me. it doesnt matter anymore does it. what i dun understand is how it all became my fault and how some people seem to take some perverse pleasure in seeing all this unfolding. fuck you and may you die in hell.

if u arent invited by me to read my blog please stop. as much as you do not like me reading yours, i do not like you reading mine. thanks. please respect my privacy.









like i am gonna fucking believe people will do that. i'll sooner shove an umbrella up my arse and open it than believe people will stop.

Oh Come On...

what's the deal on having a blog that's public when you don't want people to accidentally stumble upon them or you don't want people spreading it around. i respect ur privacy but not introducing measures to stop univited readers from reading your blog is akin to running down orchard road naked and expecting everyone to look the other way.

in hindsight, all is not lost though, at least there's a willingness to learn. =)

i Lian ! : creep says:
anyways i still don get it leh
i Lian ! : creep says:
whats wrong with not knowing how to podcast?
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
huh...
i Lian ! : creep says:
or rather, have podcast on ipod?
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
podcasts are like radio shows on the net.
i Lian ! : creep says:
that i know
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
u just have to go download it..
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
u dun need to have an ipod.
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
u can do it on a computer
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
anything
i Lian ! : creep says:
O H .
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
it's like a song file.
i Lian ! : creep says:
ooooooohhhhh
i Lian ! : creep says:
right

RIGHT.

i was recommending my friend the don and drew show, telling her to go download it and we had this conversaion. i conclude that most women are technogoons.

Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
go and download their podcast
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
gogogogo!
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
it's damn funny
i Lian ! : creep says:
ha i dunno how!
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
u dunno how to download?
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
are u serious
Puff - burn the effing lot!!! says:
u living in the stone age ah
i Lian ! : creep says:
got ipod doesnt mean must know podcast what!

i rest my case.

Don and Drew

the don and drew show simply rocks. it got me cracking and laughing and laughing and laughing. go to www.donanddrew.com i think. somewhere along that lines. it's absolutely hilarious. they do remixes, mash ups and shit like that with the weirdest things. remember to take note of this girl who speaks at the weirdest time with this japanese accent and she says the darnest thing. go check it out.

man oh man oh man. rugby has a match next week and we have 1 training session before the match. and attendanced for training and the match is not confirmed. somehow i feel the older i get the more i do not want to play contact rugby anymore. not for lack of love for the sport but more for fear of incurring an injury. it's not as easy and simple as it was when we were 15 or 16. i take longer to get up after a knock and the bruises only fade after a week.they used to disappear in days...

in addition to that, it's no longer a matter of going into a match, i'm serverly out of shape, unconditioned and unprepared. while the people we're playing are preped, hungry and out to prove a point. what in the 9 hells am i doing playing a game with them. i should be watching them play, or better yet, paying them to let me win. if i had the money, u all know what i'll do.

watched a little bit of closer today and boy, it's like reality check. and no matter how i think about it, i always conclude cheaters never prosper. why then is the grass always greener on the other side when you know nothing is going to come out of it. or is it just the thrill of getting away with it.

oh and u got to remember to check out the patented random phone call on the don and drew show. it's freaking hilarious when they call up a random number asking them whether they have a family member, pet, etc etc and they get to win a "super prize".WHAT THE FUCKING HELL MAN. nono, it doesnt end at the phone call. u just got to hear it.

and all in all, i would like to say, don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don and drew! and drew and drew and drew!

Lesson Learnt

i will never again have a monetary transaction with a friend. ever again. i've learnt it the hard way and i do not want to go through it again. i thought it was a win win situation when my friend needed to borrow my car for a few hours and i could do with some extra cash, all in all, we had a deal...

what was not so sweet was the returning of the car, in addition to not topping up the tank of petrol, i discovered a knock on my bumper where the paint was peeling off. what irked me the most was not the fact that the car was damaged but the fact that i was not informed. what was supposed to happen? that i would not notice it and when i finally do it'll be too late to claim that he did it. or was i supposed to be a good friend and say that it's okay, just a knock, nothing too serious except that the area that's damange has the paint peeling off and is about the size of a 5 dollar bill. furthermore, everyone can see it when they're 10m away from my car in the dark. with street lamps provding the only source of lighting. am i supposed to ignore that fact.

gone are the days when i had a healthy bank balance, the fucking trip to the usa has bled me dry and i do not feel good asking my parents for money. 2 over years in the army and having 1 sister married off makes me question myself sometimes when i ask my parents for money. hell people are working and studying at the age of 22. i'm just enjoying life. when i told him the cost of the repairs some fucking retarded part of me said i'll spilt it half half with him cause there were already some scratches there... wtf. and consider the trouble i would have to go thru, driving there, not being able to use the car when they were repairing it. he should thank his lucky stars that he did not go to a car rental company. i'm pretty sure he would pay more than $100.

but people being people, he claimed that someone banged him when he had already parked his car and he wasnt at fault. but he would be magmanious and pay it still (somehow everyone thinks' they're the good guy. i do and i certainly think he does). he wanted a receipt before he'll pay me. that set me off. i told him he could take the car to repair and he could pay1st and then i would pay him back. that is if he thinks that it's so fun to bring a car down to a workshop, take a train home and go down a few days later to take the car... no it's not fun and no i do not want to do it. i wish i could just take the car back and everything was as if should be, saving me and everyone else the fucking trouble.

and in case he thinks i'm out to cheat him, i could always ask for an inflated receipt, it's not unheard of in the singapore car repair market, i've always heard of stories where they inflate the repairs of a car and then spilt the profit. and i'm sure my mechanics are already ripping me off and i can only imagine what they would say should i not already know them.

anyway, he refused to repair the car and i had to do it. he gave up asking for a receipt once i told him that it was my car and up to my fucking discretion to repair or not to repair the car. regardless of the fact that he had compensated me for the damage done to my car. so all in all i'm gonna get back some cash for the damage done to my car...

it's the emotional turmoil that hurts, not like it's ripping me apart but i'm sure for those of you who have ever dealt with reasonable amounts of money with friends know what i mean. it's just plain fucking not nice to ask for money from a friend. it's very hard to ask them back for money. and i hate that feeling. i would probably feel no qualms about ripping a stranger off but when they're friends' the whole rule of thumb changes and i hate that.

You Have To Check This Out

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Bored

if i could tape down every single thing that short fud says, i could sell a book like sex and the city. someone would be staring as adrian ong, the writer of the book. it would probably be called something like everybody hates short fud.

during a meeting with the short fud and the pps, we started comparing whoose laptop had the loudest volume. got that right. which laptop could play the loudest songs. oh my bloody balls. in order to shut me out, they decided to hit under the belt, they narrowed down to which laptop could play the loudest CHINESE songs.

what they could never guess was that out of the 11 gig worth of songs i had, there was bound to be some chinese songs. my hard disk did not fail my noble cause. there it was, the calvary. SIXTY odd chinese songs. i was back in the game.

right from the onset, there was no way apple was gonna beat us. it's such a wussy brand. nice on the outside, weak on the inside. it doesnt have it where it counts. owning a mac is akin to going for plastic surgery, nice on the outside, without the substance. in fact, the mac was so soft, we could play love songs, while the mac was blasting away some rock shit and we still couldnt hear it. talk about weak.

it was down to the last 2 competitors. the brave, noble and hardy ibm think pad and the sleek and sliver hp note book. it was a close call, the think pad had the upper hand but it was a close call. too close. it was then decided that we would place each laptop with both screens facing each other. and we wld then place our heads between both warriors and see which song could be heard more clearly. as we both place our heads there there was no mistake. we both could hear iron and wine and calexico's 16, maybe less being played. then thinkpad out thunk the hp nooooote book.

in conclusion, the think pad was the loudest. followed by the hp and lastly the mac. however, it should be noted that the mac will always be last. if there was a dell inside the dell would most definately be in front of the mac. like steve jobs said, our women look better. too bad the others were men.

Rugby

it's been eons since i took part in a rugby competition. it was always something that i did for the sake of doing. since i was in the rugby team, let's just play. since i was in jc and i needed a cca, lets join rugby. since i was in the army and playing rugby could get me out of the army for 4 months a year, why not... yes, the last one was the main reason why i wanted to play rugby.

well, now in the university, why not. there's nothing to loose, my seniors are nice people, i got an automatic promotion into the exco, why not.

today's competition was called oasis tough rugby. like seriously, do they think singapore is a desert, or do they think with all the padang looks like an oasis... i cannot phatom. the 1st match was against KL canterbury. canterbury is a rugby brand, something like what adidas is to soccer, KL is the capital of you know who. and thus, they are the canterbury team from KL. and boy were they good. we were out classed, out played, out runned and out gunned by the fuckers from the north. i mean come on... you're like probably the best from 70 million people. what the hell. and you're playing a bunch of guys who play touch for fun. and to aggrevate matters, our girls just came in second for the mornings' all girls competition. to make matters worst, those same girls were in our team.

i am not saying the girls should not have or we would have won if they were, i'm just stating the situation and in fact, i am kind GREATFULL that they were willing to play for us. from where i came from, we probably would have walked away... a situation of too many medals and too much arrogance.

so all in all, we had a bunch of unfit guys and a bunch of tired girls. lethal. to make matters even worst, it was the 1st time we played together as a team. hahaha. i smell trouble. in fact it was so bad, at one point in time there were like 3 teams on the field. KL canterbury, smu guys and smu girls. the guys were doing their own things which the girls were left out of. and the girls were left defending against the KL guys. imagine that. how on earth could they stop them. it was akin to lambs to the slaughter. we were trashed.

the next match was much better. i thought it was much better, the girls had 1 thing to say.

you guys are deaf. u either cannot hear us, or u ignore us.

the guys had 1 thing to say.

we heard u screaming. but we only heard screaming.

perfect. what a way to go. talk about communication break down.

last match was the best. looked good. felt good. we lost.

ten things i learnt today

1) never take part in a competition that you are not prepared for.
2) 10 things a girl can do to spice up her sex life (this was from cleo which was freely given away there.)
3) pads can hold a lot of water. put 6 bored man together with plenty of pads from cleo and plenty of water that's what you get.
4) the names of the touch girls. like eileen is not elaine. and eileen is pronouced as E-LEEN. not I-LEEN OR $%$-LEEN. and that crystal is not gina. and that that girl with the pink pony tail is actually called nina, not called that girl with the pink pony tail.
5) they give away free sunblock now, you just have to show them that you're using it instead of taking them and trying to re-sell them.
6)i am grossly unfit.
7) touch girls are the next big thing. they're hotter than the net ball girls and less manly than female swimmers.
8) some of the touch girls are relatively cute.
9) people always loose something at rugby tournaments. today it was a brand new ball.
10) never look at a girl wearing a singlet when she's bending down.

maybe it should be always look at a girl wearing a singlet when she's bending down.

Never Again

okay, for most car rental companies, at least for those in the states, you rent a car for a flat fee. you take the car with a full tank of petrol and u return it with a full tank of petrol. failure to do so will result in a SURCHARGE.

what happened here was x borrowed a car. with an almost full tank of petrol. x returned it with 3/4 tank worth of petrol. like fuking hell. a shyte on him. and when questioned he calmly said, " i pumped better grade petrol for you. so it makes up..." LIKE FUCKING HELL. the car rental company wouldnt give 2 shytes about whether you pumped a better grade or not. like come one. lets be objective here. what kinda screwed logic is that. fuck off and burn in hell.

and just for your information, a full tank is 40 litres, power 95 costs 1.663 per litre. power 98 costs 1.707 per litre. so we'll round UP for ur sake. which means 8 cents. 8 pathetic cents. should you top up full tank with 95, it'll cost u $66.525 you pump 98 3/4 tank it's 51.21. there you have it. you owe me fucking $15 you mother fucker. i mean come on. dun be a prick and give me some lame ass excuse.

the bumper was also damaged. it wasnt peeling or anything but the paint work was peeling. and he didnt have the guts to own up. when asked he just went i think someone might have banged me when it was parked. you tell me how much i'll pay you. without any hint of doubt. to me it's guilty. you fucking banged it you bitch. good thing i found out. what the hell man.

of course the person who rented the car wasnt me...

this model is so hot. and look at the size of the pocky.



yeah, get this in japan. and the model lives in bishan near the salvation army. leave it to the stalker to find out where the model stays.

Hunter

It’s amazing what you can find or stumble upon or uncover. And the best part is that you never know you’re looking for it till it’s staring at you in front of your face.

I’m having tons of fun blog hunting now. Too much free time too little things to do. Type in a name you know and slowly screen all of the entries. I must say I am getting better at blog hunting, now a days I just know when I’m not going to get anything. It’s amazing how much difference a space makes. Let’s say this person has a Chinese name. u type jian zhong and u probably get him somewhere at page 10 of what ever you’re looking for. Type in jianzhong and wala! Number one hit! Something like www.jianzhongandthechocolatefactory.blogspot.com.

Of course I will not go all the way to page 10. in fact, I usually stop at 1. if you don’t hit it at the 1st page, you’re too far off. Look for something else. And I must say, I’ve found almost all of the people I’m looking for. almost EVERYONE is on blogspot. i wonder if there's a blog called www.blogspot.blogspot.com.

Links are another plus point. I thank my lucky stars that no one has linked me (due mainly to me strong recommendations that I do NOT wanted to be link.) yet. The worst part is when someone who you do not know links you. It’s even worst if that someone and you have tons of mutual friends. for example, you go to www.lulu.blogspot.com and you see www.wildflowers.blogspot.com wala! 1st link. and from there you can see who wildflowers knows and depending on who ur looking for and whether wildflower knows that person, you a) keep going till you find one b) give fucking up. of course you'll need plenty of iq to decipher some of the weirdest nicks that people give to their friends, lest you waste a ton of time entering each and every link hoping to find out who that person is. more importantly, you need to have tons of networking, networking here means that you need to know who knows who. this is to ensure that while on your trip to jurong, you do not take the ecp and head to siglap.

Which is basically what I’ve done. You find one blog, you use ur brains and select the link you think might be linked to your target’s blog and then you either find it or not. If you do, good. If not continue linking. But 1st of all, do NOT be a mother fucking stupid fuck face, make sure the person that you are looking for DOES indeed have a blog.

Word of mouth is another way but I do not keep in touch with that particular person I’m looking for anymore and the mutual friends between us are well few and far between.

In fact, I do not even know if he has a blog.

Are there any other ways to find a blog? Oh, during the course of blog hunting, I’ve hunted down 1,2,3 ex-girlfriend’s blogs… hahaha. Amazing. And 6 blogs which belonged to people whom I’ve long assumed to have vanished off the face of this earth. And countless other people’s blog…

Truly spectacular indeed.

p.s I’m doing this completely out of fun and laughter peace and joy. And a tad of “kay pohness”. Well… except for the elusive blog, the holy grail that I am looking for, if it does ever exist. Well you can say that I’m a www.knightoftheholygrail.blogspot.com hahaha.

Behind Bars. Almost.

Goodness gracious me. I was almost jailed today… and for what one might query. It’s for not paying me mrt fare.

In the papers today, one can be jailed the maximum of 6 months and fined $2,000 for the cheating of bus or mrt fares. There was an outcry of the members of parliament who felt that the gahmen was coming down too hard on offenders. But what could you expect with Singapore being… well… Singapore. In addition, many readers were complaining that people might not pay fares due to a variety of reasons. One of them being a student who is rushing out of a station might forget to tap his card or tap too fast for the reader to read his card. Would he then he jailed? Another one was old people might tap their cards 1 stop too early as they are old…?

Me, forgot to tap my card yesterday at the mrt station I was alighting at. Well I did, but I think it did not read cause I remember the door closing on me. But it opened soon enough, I assumed it opened when the guy behind me tapped his card (fucker).

Anyways, on the way to school today, I fucking could not open the gate. I tapped my card and was greeted by a red flasher. What the fuck I told myself, some worker there then told me to try another gantry and lo and behold, the red flasher struck, AGAIN. In despair and in a desperate rush for time, I went to the dreaded, CONTROL station. The guy checked out me card and smile. He said, you didn’t tap your card when you came out of the station yesterday. He went on to say that I must remember, or else next time they will have to arrest me.

I swear, he said it in all earnestness. %*^%*&%#$^$%&#

#$^$%*&$*#%&#$^@#%

$%$#^%&$%*#$&#&#$^#

The day someone goes to jail for not tapping his mrt card when exiting the station he alighted at will be the day I migrate. This I swear upon my university education.

Oh, btw, smoking is now banned at bus stops, hawker centres etc etc. *cheers round the house*.

You've got to check this out.

matrix - http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=13297

every wondered why you're the more fun guy to be with at a party? - http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=13390

this one is for the ladies... cause SOMEONE thinks it's very KAWAII NE. - http://www.tongcom.co.kr/dingani_13.htm

and you wonder why certain countries are more developed compare to others. - http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=13401



the irish scare crow... got to love the irish.



who ever said bread is life cannot be more right...



this is a classic.

and finally. the bomb.

Gundam Seed Destiny

i've been watching gsd recently, in fact, i've finished both gundam seed and gundam seed destiny and i cannot help but notice the whole setting for gundam seed is flawed. from an economic view point that is.

1st, every commander fights battles hoping to inflict maxium causualties and incurring minium loses. in layman terms (mainly for women), i want to punch u and not get punched in return.

so in order to reduce losses, people then invented bows and arrows, where i can shoot you from a million centimeters. this is a vast improvement over swords and knives and spears and staffs. i mean, IF i hit you, you aint gonna be able to come close enought to chop me up, even if it doesnt kill you, i can keep on shooting you. an archer can shoot 30 arrows per minute at an effective range of 70m. now the fastest man can cover 100m in ard 10s, so an average man can cover that distance in about 16s, plus armour and weapons etc etc, in about 30s. so it'll probably take that 25s to cover 70m. which means i can attempt to shoot you 13 times. which is a lot.

armour was then made thick enough to stop arrows. which then cause the invention of crossbows. (i shall skip the story and fast forward here. make up ur own history lesson.)

we proceed straght to tanks. which mainly repel bullets. as we all know, tanks are so much more expensive than a suite of armour. BUT it makes sense when we see how it SAVES the lives of people. in addition, it is difficult to destroy a tank. you can do so with a RPG or another tank. but for simplicities sake, we'll talk about the american M1A1, which happens to be virtually indestructible. in fact, the americans lost 1 tank in the 1st gulf war as it was rendered immobile. in order to not let such a valuable piece of equipment fall into the hands of the enemy, they destroyed their own tank... in the 2nd gulf war, they also lost no tanks due to enemy fire. instead, the lost 1 tank when the bridge it was travelling on collasped... COLLASPED. so tanks were economically viable since they were a) offered good enough protection b) not easily destroyed (which means that ur 1 million dollar investment would survive many battles.)

gsd however has many robots, the ones that we'll concern ourselves with are gundams and jins. jins are piloted by the bad guys or characters who basically do NOT affect the story in any way. and gundams are piloted by good guys and bad guys...

fact - gundams are virtually indestructible.
fact - gundams destroy jins with 1 shot.
false - jins cannot hit gundams and when they do, they just cause the pilot extreme uncomfort which is followed quickly by their own demise. compare with a mosquito sucking you blood. the main difference is that you ALWAYS feel the mosquito biting and you always kill the mosquito.

put 1and 1 togther and u'll realise gsd simply doesnt make sense. why mass produce jins that are destroyed so easily and even worst, they cannot kill ANYTHING...

out of point fact - guys in gsd are good looking and have good bods.
out of point fact 2 - girls in gsd come in 1 standard cut. 24,36,34. with the faces to match.

Femme Fatale

Here she comes, you better watch your step
She's going to break your heart in two, it's true
It's not hard to realize
Just look into her false colored eyes
She builds you up to just put you down, what a clown

'Cause everybody knows(She's a femme fatale)
The things she does to please(She's a femme fatale)
She's just a little tease(She's a femme fatale)
See the way she walks
Hear the way she talks

You're put down in her book
You're number 37, have a look
She's going to smile to make you frown, what a clown
Little boy, she's from the street
Before you start, you're already beat
She's gonna play you for a fool, yes it's true

'Cause everybody knows(She's a femme fatale)
The things she does to please(She's a femme fatale)
She's just a little tease(She's a femme fatale)
See the way she walks
Hear the way she talks

Random Thoughts

during a business plan discussion about what we can do that will sell in singapore. short fud suddenly shoots," we can do like buildings that are earthquake proof. it's very interesting."

the room fell into silence.

i recovered quickly and said," we're in SIN-GA-PORE. there aint no fucking earthquakes here. who's gonna buy it. it's like selling oil to a sheik."

my friend told me he was in trouble as he was dating a 17 yr old. and that he wanted to dump her cause she was too immature and his mother does like girls who do not go to the university.

what he FORGOT to tell me is that he's interested in someone else...

oh and that he and THAT girl are going out too.

never type in caps when you're chatting on msn. especially when someone could/might/will get angry with you. I WAS BRANDED UNGRATEFUL AND RUDE BECAUSE I WAS TYPING IN CAPS. oh my fucking balls. i forgot to turn them off and they kinda looked nice in caps.

the show that stars PP as a retard and beautiful mermaid is back. stupid as it seems it is so dark that it's just captivating. don't we all love it when the good guys are in dissary and the forces of evil threaten everything that is good and pure.

my dog barks at everything and everyone.

PROVIDED she is behind the gate.

AND the gate must be locked, closed is not good enought. LOCKED.

my mom tells my dog..." darling, u cannot walk on the road... got car car... car car dangerous... go back go back. wait the car car bang you then you pain pain."

notice all the repetition of words.

mad. as if my dog can understand a word she is saying...

Cardinalities.

i remember how i laughed my ass off at my proff for not being able to teach us cardinalities properly. i thought he was incompetent, unprepared and pure stupid.

now i'm trying to do cardinalities and i think i'm incompetent, unprepared and pure stupid.

but i know i'm not incompetent.

i did prepare.

and i am most definately not stupid.

suddenly it's not so funny anymore and the only person i hear laughing is everyone else. when did i become the joke...

How to be a successful evil overlord

How to be a Successful Evil Overlord
by Peter Anspach

Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. However every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies invariably gets overthrown and destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad scientists, or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present...

The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord
My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear Plexiglas visors, not face concealing ones.
My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.
My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell in my dungeon.
Shooting is not too good for my enemies.
The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragon of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.
I will not gloat over my enemies predicament before killing them.
When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought, I'll shoot him and then say "No."
After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.
I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled, "Danger: Don Not Push". The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will clearly not be labelled as such.
I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum - a small hotel room well outside my border will work just as well.
I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.
One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.
All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least several round of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.
The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.
I will never employ any device with a digital count-down. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable. I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.
I will never utter the sentence "But before I kill you, there's just one thing I want to know."
When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.
I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would prove a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.
I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance and she'd betray her own father.
Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.
I will hire a fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legion of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman foot soldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.
No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way -- even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless -- my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.
I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strength and weaknesses. Even though this takes some fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)
No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible spot.
No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive which is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bed chamber.
I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.
My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.
I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.
All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.
All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcements and/or romantic sub-plot for the hero or his side-kick.
I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.
I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.
I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.
I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.
If my trusted lieutenant tell me my Legion of Terror is losing a battle, I will believe him.. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.
If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.
If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.
I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable super-weapon, I will use it early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.
Once my power is secure, I will destroy all of those pesky time travel devices.
When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys that happens to follow him around.
I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.
I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.
I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him and say "And here is the price for failure." then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.
If an advisor says to me "My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?", I will reply "This." and kill the advisor.
If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.
I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.
If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all of my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.
If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions of the beautiful princess' cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people oriented position.
I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.
If the beautiful princess that I capture says "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.
I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.
The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legion of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.
My Legion of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.
Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owners manual.
If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.
I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.
My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: This also applies to passwords.
If my advisors ask "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?" I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.
I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.
Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of this nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.
I will see a compentant psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be disadvantageous.
If I must have a computer system with publicly available terminals, the maps they display will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.
My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints and then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.
No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.
I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save my life again.
All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.
When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.
If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.
If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon, instead of using my unstoppable super weapon on them.
I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.
When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.
I will instruct my Legion of Terror to attack the heroes en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.
If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)
If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.
I will not tell my Legion of Terror "And he must be taken alive-" the command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonable practical."
If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited edition commemorative coins.
If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.
If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.
I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerously unbalanced structure.
If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.
I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. "Align the 12 stones of power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse." Instead it will be more alone the lines of "Push the button/"
I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.
My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.
If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to do the task again.
After I capture the hero's super weapon, I will not disband legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.
I will not design my main control room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.
I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.
If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead, I will say that his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and the underling who failed or betrayed me, I will die first.
When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.
My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cell mate tells the guard it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening the cell for a look.
My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.
My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unraveled.
If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However, if circumstances have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each other' lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.
Any data files of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45Mb.
Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free, unlimited internet access.

with all the current hurricanes, earth quakes, tsunamis etc etc, you often read about how much humanitarian aid they are receiving etc etc. and of course you'll never fail to read a section which states how much singapore donates.

i've noticed if singapore has donated a big amount they'll make a big fuss about it. ie, front page, singapore donated 10m to indonesia for the tsunami for example. as you all know the huge earth quake that has hit pakistan. and the gahmen there for all their foresight and pride has reluctantly accepted aid from india. stupid. if i were them i'll take whatever comes my way... so what if we're at war. if india invades now, you'll be quite dead. anyway, in today's papers, kuwait has donated a whooping 100m dollars if i'm not wrong. 100m dollars. USD. not rupiahs. U-FUCKING-SD. usa not to be outdone similiary donated a not as whooping but still whooping 50m USD. again. whoo hoo!!! smashing. and right at the bottom, far far away from these attention grabbing sentences, singapore has donated 100m USD!!! NO WAIT. typo. i meant 100k usd. the difference 1 letter makes. sigh. but at least we sent in a DART team and an expericenced veteran who was at acheh, i dunno where and i cant remember where else. but he served at FOUR places. WICKED. now i'm sure rubble and debris will get out of his way. i mean he IS a veteran at diasters. he'll do.

oh and there's a lady on this trip too. wicked!!!

back to the point, i wonder whether they'll even notice the aid we're sending. or take note of it. can u imagine if singapore has a diaster and pakistan said, u sent us 1 dart team now we'll send you our own dart team...

or should we need help from indonesia and they said, u did so much for us last time but we let u win the sea games football finals. now we're even. if u forgot singapore BEAT indonesia... shocking.

Die

i cannot stand you. pure and simple. i detest your presence. i cringe when i hear you call out my name. i sigh when i look at my ringing phone and see your number on my screen. and when u call me again, it's all that i can do not to switch off my phone. i hate your egocentrical ways, it's so unbecoming and uncalled for. maybe you should grow some self-esteem so you'll be more reassured of your own usefulness. then again, i seriouly doubt how useful you can get. you make the most patient people impatient, anger the most good tempered, distress the undistressable. more shocking, you seem to invoke hate in every-other-person you meet. maybe hate is too strong. u make everyone else detest you. you're just detestable. i bet when your mother 1st laid eyes on you she wanted to smother and kill you. if it weren't for the nurses holding you away from her you would probably be dead. damn she should have killed you. it's no wonder you fail at relationships. you should just go fuck yourself, at least then you're fucking something.

stop trying to be interested in alternative or less well know items hoping that somehow having a tiny grasp of such knowledge immediately places you in the "cool" gang. it's time you figured, you're either cool, or you're not. if you're not then it's no big deal. what's worst than not being cool?

being you.

so stop pretending that you know the whole word, stop telling me how long you msn list is and stop saying hi to everyone you meet, esp when almost all of them are walking away and wiping the sweat of their brows, thanking the lord that you didnt have to talk to them. or walking away wondering who the fuck is that retarded looking dickhead who just waved to me.

True Files

“serious man, you fucking missus is nuts. My missus is nuts and all, she rings me at least 40 times a day…. Serious!”
I seen you last night, you were drinkin' in the pub,
You were drinkin' with that bird you tried to chat up in the nightclub,
Can't say her name but she's got a gammy eye,
And I'm feeling near her violence when I have to walk on by,
You can't deny it, it's something you can't miss,
That bird thats hangin' out with you is mad like cats piss,
Like bread and jam or a knife drawn with butter,
Face it son, your missus is a nutter!
Chorus-
Oh son, your missus is a nutter!
Oh son, your missus is a nutter!
Oh son, your missus is a nutter!
Leave her at home! Your missus is a nutter!
I never seen a woman make a fuckin' skinhead cry,
And I never seen a woman tryin' to snap an arm with a thigh,
Now I have and its just across the pub,
And the worst thing is,
she's taking you out for a rub,
You don’t deserve it, you know it’s a fact,
But mix her up with booze you gotta suicide pact,
2 tequilas and 4 vodka mules,
She's a wrecking ball and her fists are the tools.
Binge drinking, binge drinking tried keeping up with your missus,
What was I thinking?
She looks like Caprice,
But it’s a shock to see her wrestling 2 police,
With one in a headlock!
Fighting with bouncers and flashing her bits,
After too flamin’ sambucas she dont care who she hits,
Waking up on Sunday morning with bruises and cuts,
Face it son, your missus is nuts!
Chorus
Your missus was looking at my missus,
So my missus, sparked out your missus,
Your missus was looking at my missus,
So my missus, sparked out your missus,
It was last week, what really got me thinking,
About how your missus goes nuts when we go drinking,
Last week, she ended up on a binge, she got off her tits,
And showed the bouncers her minge,
And it’s the threat of grievous bodily harm,
She needs to keep calm,
And use her charm,
I used to think it was funny,
It made me laugh,
When she threw the ash trays at the bar staff.
Stabbed a man with a comb, just to get a drink,
Theres no logic, just stand there
Drink, fight, drink, fight, drink
She grabs your throat, and stares into your eyes,
Have you ever seen a woman kill a man with her thighs?
Oh son, your missus is trouble,
Everytime you have a drink she has a double,
Is she on pukkas?
I think shes tripping?
Stop lookin' at me love it's water what I'm sippin'.
Break-
“I seen her get on a mountain bike, and drove into timbland (?) and did ‘em all in…. wikkid”
Repeat chorus X 3
(over third chorus)
(pussy whip, pussy whip….)
“shes nuts man, shes off ‘er

GLC - your missus is a nutter

by, during an england vs wales football match, this band performed this song, dedicating it to david beckham. imagine the look on victoria adams face. priceless.

it's true, i've dated someone like this and it's no joke i'm telling you. for all of you who know who she is and are quietly sniggering to yourself, go fuck yourself. the only difference is that she does not need to drink. she's already at that stage.

the more i think about whether my dad will get me a new car, the more i feel it's jut wishful thinking on my part. knowing him the chances that he'll do something like that is almost next to nil. sigh.

driving through this road at pierce last night brought back bad memories... i skidded there once almost a year ago and even now when i'm racing through that exact bend, my hands start getting cold and my feet start trembling. i instinctively stepped on the brake despite conciously telling myself not to. sigh. $50. good thing that the guy who was behind me really sucked. and i would not have gone there if i wasnt hard up for cash in the 1st place. but it was an easy $50. too bad he couldnt stomache losting another $50. was really hoping he would ask for a rematch. but then things dont always go the way you want it to yah. sighs.

Keeping My Fingers Crossed

my dad told me to check out my car's remaining parf and coe value. which could only mean 1 thing. he wants to sell the car...

my heart skipped a beat and i held my breath.

next, he told me how his friend sold his car and bought a brand new car. his friend topped up $5000 for a brand new car.

estacsy

i asked my mom what dad wanted to do with the information and she told me he was almost quite convinced to sell this car and buy a brand new car.

a bloody shitting brand new mother fucking car.

wicked.

i checked out my old war horse and it's worth around 22,000 +++.

score.

if all goes well i'll be driving a new car pretty soon. let's hope it's sooner rather than later.

old, ailing and dying

my grand mother is old, ailing and dying. it's just a matter of time i suppose. sad and morbid but it's just part and parcel of life. no big deal. it's not like we were very close, me not being able to converse in hokkien and she not being able to converse in english or chinese. but i still love her and i care for her. no she's not like going to die in the near future. she's 80+ so i give it a max of 99. no i'm not being morbid. just realistic.

what galls me the most is the internal struggle for her wealth. it's just digusting. you have 8 sons and 2 daughters and granted, most of them cannot be bothered about it. but it's disgusting how the 3 of you try to isolate her from the rest of her children in a desperate and pathetic attempt to horde her fortune for yourselves. for you 2 spinsters who couldnt get married (for obvious reasons, mainly your too god damn bloody fucking obnoxious and anal) and think that since you have been taking care of her all this while you deserve more. well fuck off. if you had been a tad more attractive, a tad more open and a tad less conservative you would probably have gotten married. but no and just too bad. just know that in your old age do not even think about approaching me for help. i've seen the way you treat your own mother and i'n disgusted. if you were not older than me and grandma wasnt there i would have given you a piece of my mind. what's wrong with giving into the her once in a while. it's not as iff you'll die.

and lastly, my "FAVORITE" uncle. i hope you die and burn in hell for all of eternity. it's no wonder all you brothers hated you. and most of the nephews. and stop telling me your toyota corolla is faster, more comfortable and more beatiful than my nissan sunny. and for god's sake do not tell me your fucked up car has a sports mode. i'm in the university for crying out loud while you daughter had to retake her a'levels and your son is just... stupid would be too nice.
granted you car is newer, it is more comfortable but it is not faster. ha! tried it time and again. and to me, that's all that matters. BUT since you like to compare so much, how about we compare my car to you son's car!!

of wait, he doesnt have a driving liscense. i wonder why. are you too poor to send him to the driving school. and even if he had one, will you buy him a car. so stop telling me i've got a fucked up car. bottom line is i got a car and it moves. it goes where i want it to go at the very least.

and stop playing the role of the return of the prodigal son. you've never been there so stop trying to act like you're there now. the whole world knows you're eyeing what ever fortune she has left. it's so despicable it just had to be you to play that role. even your own daughter is disgusted by you. fancy forcing her to go down once a week to look after grandma. shame on you, you asswipe.

EQ

taking the train home today, i was appalled at the stupidity of some people. i had a presentation this morning and was wearing office wear and these 3 secondary school girls were standing in front of me... so far so good. but put 3 girls together and what do u get? a mass bitching session. incidentally they were loud enough for me to hear them. let's call them dumb, dumber and dumbest, for simplicities' sake, D, DD AND DDD. d was making a comment about ME to dd and ddd regarding my attire. "look at that guy, wear so nice then go home so early... must be kena sacked then asked to leave. that's why leave so early...". dd and ddd agreed whole heartedly. OH MY FUCKING GOD. are you dumb or are u dumb. when someone wears office wear he must be working...? and i cannot see how their simple thought process works. office wear in a train during non office hours = kena sacked.

maybe i had taken the day off, maybe i have an emergency at home. what if i'm in sales or the insurance industry. maybe i'm off to meet a client... but getting sacked? maybe, judging from your unrecognizable uniforms you're MOST probably not smart enough to get into a better school and perhaps your biggest aim in life is to finish up your N'levels and then start work. perhaps ur a bit more inspired, how about your fucking o'levels instead, i mean it's just 1 more year, how hard can it get? but then again, i beg to differ. if you place your efforts into studying you might just end up in the university, instead of galleventing around orchard road at 12 pm in the day. another example of truancy. if you want to skip school have to decency to not wear your god damned uniform especially during school hours. you obviously do not know enough to know that some members of the public take pride in reporting truancy, smoking, vulgar language to the schools involved. but then i dun blame you, you can barely speak coherently.

in my hands i was holding an issue of today. what i cannot seem to understand is why does today have an advertisement as every fucking alternate page. go take a look at today. it's one page articles, one page advertisement. repeat the process till you reach the end of the paper. oh and the front page and the back page is a advertisement. today's one was an advertisement on the 1st humans, how we evolved and what we'll most likely be in a gazillion years time. it's like wah lao aye... DD noticed that i was flipping the newspapers really fast and said," then u see him read the newspaper, obviously never read one. action only." die and burn in hell you bitch. do u expect me to read every single advertisement... and even if i were skimming through no one reads EVERY SINGLE BLOODY FLAMING article. most people only read the section that interests them or for today's case, the articles that you find most relevant.

i swear if i were holding the asia wall street journal you would probably be wondering what the hell i was reading.

for crying out loud if you wanna bitch about someone make sure he/ she cannot hear you.

on the way back i met 2 little girls, they were walking along the pavement playing LETS GUESS THE CAR'S LISCENSE PLATE as well as the BRAND. FINE. i understand kids do the most retarded things and i still do it now a days. when they reached my car the 1st girl said, BMW! followed by EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE NEVER WASH ONE. WHAT THE FUCK. what the fuck. am i destined to meet people like that for my whole life. furious i unleashed my dog on them.... that dumb bitch was so scared of them she refused to step out of the house.

what's new...

the other one promptly rebutted. it's a nissan sunny lah idiot. bmw nicer.

you shattered my heart into a million pieces and all the king's soldiers and all the kings men could never put adrian back together again.