Under The Stars

i went to nokia's cinema under the starlight festival last night to catch harry potter and i swear, it is the single most uncomfortable experience since my army days. u may say i've gotten soft, nuai and weak but i stand by my stand, it was uncomfortable. if it was not for the great company i had with me i would most surely have left regardless of whether i had extracted full utility of the ticket or not.

it was a nice place but it could not compare to fort canning, not by a long shot. and the name movie under the starlight is nice and all if there HAD been any stars. as far as i could tell u could see nothing in the cloud strickened sky. and even if it had been a clear cloudless night, with all the lights coming from the street lamps and sky scrapers, we would never have been able to see anything. trust me on the lights. in fact, the only place where i've ever seen stars at night are pulau tekong, chua chu kang (certain parts), the great australian outback and brunei. if you've noticed, these places are places far away from civilisation and that is probably why we can see the stars at night. it's as if civiliasation has sucked out every part of nature, leaving behind it's hard, cold and unfeeling buildings. but the few times you are able to see the starry starry night, where you can see a star as far as your eyes can look. when you can see the jeweled box, a collection of stars that are so faint, you can only see them when you're using a pair of binos or anything more powerful and through the binos you finally see their muti-coloured splendor. or being able to easily make out orion and not just seeing his belt...

back to my point. the queue at the movie screening was ridiculously long. it stretched from the field nearer to SRC all the way back till it covered half of SRC. but at least it moved real fast and i was proud to see that majority of the people watching the show had the decency to move to the back of the queue rather than try to cut the queue. it was no mean feat to cut the queue and in fact i was very tempted to cut the field knowing that the average singaporean would probably just give me the dirty look and more importantly, keep their traps shut. but no, i guess spending too much time with BY has made me a big fat softie. no, i just didnt see the point of cutting the queue and we ended up walking all the way to the end of the queue.

the job of an emcee is really easy, you just have to keep talking about the main sponsors and how great they are. it's much easier when you are equipped and authorised to give away as many goodie bags as you want. and it doesnt take much skill on their part to ask questions like ," WHO IS THE MAIN SPONSOR FOR THIS EVENT?! p.s, it's written on the ticket..." or " which car company is one of the sponsors for this event? remember the car you saw on the way in? " or," which mineral water company sponsored this event? LOOK AT THE BALLONS THAT ARE SURROUNDING YOU!!"

the best part was when they asked this guy what movies were they screening tonight, and he answered in this high pitched, nasal sounding, heavily accented ah beng voice completed with ah beng grammer," i am here to watching arry potter and the chamberS of secret (where is the s in secrets?!?!) and the prisoner of aaaaa azkaba." when i heard that i just looked at BY and smiled only to see her looking back at me and giving me that DID YOU HEAR THAT look. i couldn't help smirking to myself when the emcees said, " I AM TRYING VERY HARD NOT TO LAUGH." what the hell!!! talk about being untactful or politically wrong man. how on earth did he managed to get the job, even i had the better sense to not make a snipe comment when i heard that.

after the 1st movie we, actually i thinkit was more I then WE couldn't take it anymore. my legs were sore and my ass was protesting. my back was aching and i wished that someone would be smart enough to make a screen such that i can look at it when i am lying flat down on my back and gazing up into the sky. do not tell me it is impossible because i believe almost nothing is impossible in the world now a days. all it takes is a strong desire for that to happen and of course, UNLIMITED FUNDING. the power of money and as i've always said, money is not everything but money can make many things many times less difficult. bottom line, i want to have so much money i can use them to wipe my ass, blow my nose and to use money as rough paper. since the singapore bill is not tearable, i could just hire somebody and pay him/her to wash the money i've used to wipe my ass, blow my nose and scribble my notes on. and should someone decide to sue me i could a) hire a the best lawyer money could buy and sue the other fucker to hell. 2) pay him what ever amount he wants to keep his mouth shut and while i'm paying him i'll arrange to have his gf/wife there and hopefully his gf/ wife will be quite hot and then i'll offer them what ever amount of money they want to spend 1 night with me!!! hahaha!!! or if they are fugly, then i'll just pay them enough money to get them to dump him. san) i'll hire the best assasin money can buy and just kill the fucker. and then i'll wipe out his entire family no matter how distant so that his entire bloodline will never grace the face of this earth again. period.