Lying Naked On The Floor

Tramatised. i've been tramatised by the likes of a preschooler trapped in the body of a 20yr old. imagine the torment and suffering the poor soul has to go through, being caught in a limbo when she's neither here nor there. trapped, stuck and left walking in circles... who this creature is, u might wonder. for simplicity's sake, ler her be known as lulu. how did i end up in such a predicament, that left me torn, lying naked on the floor, read on.

it all began one tuesday night when i met lulu at suntec, she was there to repair her samsung handphone (btw, korean made goods are simply inferior. take for example the SPOILT korean made hp, the tuscani, which is made by HYUNDAI that also happens to be a korean company. here i feel the general publuc ought to be enlightened. as stylish and as sleek the tuscani looks. it is nothing more than a cheap marketing gimmick to cheat the uninformed and not car savy of their hard earned money. the car looks good and feels good ONLY from the driver's seat onward. move back to the passenger's seat and u'll be suprised! gone is the solid feel on the car, instead, cheap plastic and a hollow sounding interior shocks u. the metal wielding at the boot is simplay disgussting with absolutely no finesse and workmanship.), i was waiting to meet a friend for dinner. thus, we met to catch up. during the time we spent catching up we decided to meet up proper "one of these days", a wednesday night was decided on which forever sealed my fate.

wednesday afternoon, i was caught washing cars at some spastic car wash. it was $6 a car, with $2 coming to me, $2 going to my friend and $2 going to who else but the freaking boss. how this might seem a meager sum to be earning but do the maths old boy and soon, u'll want ur own petrol kiosk to wash cars. it takes 5 mins to wash 1 car, in a hour the maximum number of cars u can wash will be... okay, the ans is 12. give and take because we all know u wun be washing cars non-stop and neither will cars be coming in non-stop. thus, u wash 6 cars per hour. that's a whooping $12 per hour. now tell me how many jobs pay better and i'll take my hat off to u dear friend. and that's NOT INCLUDING waxing ur car. for a small flat fee of a FUCKING $80, we'll wax ur car for u. while waxing a car is labour intensive and time consuming, there's always machines to help out and there's nothing much to do but slack and take a break while waiting for the wax to dry. plus, the pay off for waxing is a cool $20 per car. hahaha! orgasimic i swear. in fact, i was so caught up washing cars that by the time i left it was 6pm ++. cool, 1 small prob, i was supposed to meet LULU at 530. haha. OOPS. well, ended up meeting her at eunos mrt at 630, well fine, i got there at 640.

dinner was great and the food not too bad, the only thing was the company. imagine seating at a table with a preschooler who talks too loud, whines and moans. if that wasnt bad enough, i had a complete moron screaming her head off and laughing like a mad man in my car, thank god it was in a enclosed environment and screw the devil that in was in an enclosed environment. 1stly, all praise to god above that it was in my car so no one else could hear or see her. 2ndly, an enclosed environment tends to amplify sound. take for example, a car. then through some cruel twist of fate, LULU discovered a weakness of mine. she found it so amusing she continuously exploited the weakness (much to my dismay)and as if that wasnt enough, she founf it so amusing she went into the mega decibls. IN MY CAR for goodness sake.

thus, the long and cruel oppression of LULU began. however, no empire can withstand the ravages of time. evil fades and good returns, good then fades and evil returns. soon, it was time to lulu to go home(hallelujah) and me, was left alone to my peace and solitude of the car.

phew.

phew again.

and finally, PHEW.

till next time.

p.s for all those who know THINK they know identity of lulu with refernece to the name lulu, please note that the name lulu was plucked from the endless and boundless deeps of my imagination. any resembalance to any people living or otherwise is purely coincidental.