Lord Wilberforce

want to find a chick magnet?

get an apple. 

it's a chick magnet. now i'm not debating the quality of chicks it attracts, a fat and ugly chick is still a chicken, maybe we should call it a hen... but what if the chick is young? would young hen suffice? maybe we should call fat, ugly and young chicks yens. hahaha. and fat, ugly, young and lianish chicks lens. LOL.

So states the great Lord Wilberforce.

Wiberforce. what a name. what does Wiberforce stand for? for one, we all know what force is, it's MASS X ACCELERATION. to get a big force, u either have big mass or blinding acceleration. if ur talking tusnami force, hainv both is an excellent idea. now what does wilber stand for. wil is a short for for will. do we concur? so if wil = will then wilber = willer. i stand to be corrected. if 1 + 1 = 2, then Wilberforce = willer + big mass + big acceleration, which would translate to somebody who has a strong will to enforce his will upon others (Lord Wilberforce is a chieft justice or something like that in England) that carries great weight as well as forcing changes quickly. thus, Lord Wiberforce. it also explains why he is a fucking famous and apparently influential lawyer in great old blue blooded england.

they say u are what u eat, if that is true, i must survive on a steady diet of shit shit and more shit for all the shit that i am churning out.

there's this girl sitting on the opposite table she keeps looking at me, knowing how physically unattractive i am, i conclude she's either looking at my laptop, looking at my zen neeon or looking at both and wondering what kind of sick and demented idiot i must be to be using an i book while listening to a zen neeon. it's like eating a mushroom swiss and having macdonalds fries. they not only look out of place together, they also cost more.

but then again, maybe i have a warpped conception about my ability to attract members of the opposite sex. i would love to believe the latter but the former stands victorious.

who on earth is walter woon. it sounds like a game show. where oh where is carmen sandiago carmen sandigo! walter woon, i rather be playing where's wally instead of playing this bitch of a game called "lets TRY to decipher what on earth walter woon is TRYING to tell me." am i suprised that his textbook is thick and unreadable?

no.

it's just another one of those devious ploys lawyers conjure so as to get clients to waste time and money 1) PRTNTING IT OUT. (it's not 5 cents per page) 2) SPEND MORE TIME ON CONSULTATIONS TRYING TO UNDERSTAND WHAT THE HELL THEY ARE SAYING. since amount of time spent enlightening us unenlighten folk has a direct and positive correlation to the amount of money they earn, i am not suprised at all.

ps it doesnt help that when i call for help (regarding company law) the 1st words i hears are "i charge $5 per hour, the time now is XXXX ur time starts now." and the last thing i hear is " i made money today!!!!"