I swear that if I have a daughter, her room is going to look like yours with fresh lavender flowers every single day.

And the Simpson’s absolutely rocks. Here’s one reason why.


To be continued...

Immediately

It's one of those times where you feel

that you're moving 2 steps backwards with every step forward. And you can't help but wonder why you keep trying. Perhaps it's just easier to not move then stagnation is at least better then retardation. But is it?

Back to my house. Leaving the renovations under the supervision of a woman is not a good idea by a long shot. Thanks to my mom's brillance, we have have power sockets where there was never power sockets. Now, there's power sockets JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE. And her reason for having them? In case we need them, we don't have to install them... She's obviously never heard an extension or multiplug.

Apparently, my parents decided to install an alarm system in the house too.

Now everytime I walk into the driveway, a mini super nova lights up. Or rather, when I walk to my driveway, my dog runs up to the gate and triggers the light. And you should really see the look on her face when the lights come on. It's like, WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED!!!

My parents went to change the lightning conductor for my house.

And now EVERYTIME there's lightning...

IT FUCKING STRIKES MY HOUSE.

While playing our new WII, i made a comment, "if you're going to spend 18 gold, u might as well spend 20! what's the difference!"

yx (auditor), "the difference is 2 gold."

Alv(engineer at NEA), "i dunno..."

yx, "the difference between an auditor and an engineer..."

The show is over

maybe it's time for another show. A show that I really want to watch this time and not something that just happened to be on television.

Having a talk with a taxi driver really opened my eyes.

They say that my problem is that I don't know what I want.

But if I know what I don't want, then at least I indirectly directly know what I want.

Because if I know what I do not want, then I'll know what I want provided I know everything that I do not want, since by knowing that then everything else would be what I would want.

Linc's problem:

Having too many girls to choose from, he can't make up his mind.

My problem:

Having too many girls to choose from, I can't make up their mind.

Difference:

Linc gets to choose while no one chooses me.

I've just seen the lamest nick ever.

"when sting retires, will he become stung?!"

OH MY FLAMING BALLS.

No one likes to be short-changed

least of all me.

I hate how conversations asking me whether I would like to do something turn into lopsided statements – you are becoming like X. Then why ask for my opinion. But this has nothing to do with me being short-changed. I think.

Snapping at me because although you were sick, you were still out late at night is completely not justified because you were probably still sick because you went to the beach. To sun tan but since there was no sun; you just ended up playing volley ball which is probably the lesser of the 2 evils. With a particular someone nonetheless but it was probably, believably, doubtlessly planned in advanced. But it could just be pure coincidence.

What ever.

I had something on and it just would not be right for me to expect you to stay home because it’s just not you. But I did not expect you to meet him. Or maybe I did, which was why I went out of my way to pop by your place just to say hi (more likely it was to tell myself what an idiot I was, having these groundless idiotic thoughts). Anyway, the point is I went out of my way and somehow I decided that maybe a phone call would be more in line. And you did pick it up (after countless attempts) and you were out with him.

What ever would probably be a lie because it definitely did suck. But at least you were honest.

Factoring how things took a turn for the worst after your trip up north, presumably because you were confused, I can’t help but place 1 and 1 and 1 together to draw a conclusion and it’s all beginning to make sense. At least to me it is, as senseless and groundless as it may seem.

This brings me back to my point. No one likes to be short-changed, least of all me.

and this website is really funny.

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/victories.html

The Perfect Woman

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.

One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.

There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.

Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.

Who was the survivor? (Scroll down for the answer.)






















The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.

Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.

Men keep scrolling****.






















So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: women never listen.

The Keyword is Interested!

If I could shoot one person for being the biggest idiot in the world right now. I'll shoot myself.

You obviously don't care.

And I'm starting not to care as well.

Can someone please tell me why did I take the god damn mother fucking Panadol?

Seriously. Please tell me why like now!

So much for I think I'm not allergic to Panadol

1. Playing tennis when I feel that I've got a fever coming up is most definately not a good idea.

2. Despite feeling feverish, I decided to go ahead and play tennis from 9 - 11. Some where in the back of my mind I told myself that if i sweated it out. I'll be fine.

3. I've sweated it out, had my fun and I'm so not bloody fucking fine. In fact, we went swimming after the match, NOT smart at all.

4. It was so bad, that I decided to take Panadol which I'm allergic to to bring the temperature down. Instead of taking 1, I took 2. SMART.

5. At 5pm, 3 hours after taking the Panadol, "hey mom, I don't think I'm allergic to Panadol anymore. It's not swollen. (Meaning my eye)"

6. At 7pm, I can barely open my right eye. "Mom, I think I'M STILL ALLERGIC TO PANADOL."

Some people should just know better.

While I was driving someone was knocking the roof of my car....

"hey your roof sounds hollow..."

"it's the roof. there's nothing on the other side."

"but my lexus's roof doesn't sound like this."

NW, "CAUSE THIS IS A JAPANESE CAR. NOT LIKE YOUR LEXUS."

Some people should just know better.
:)

During lunch, we had an unexpected and more importantly uninvited guest who somehow or rather imposed herself on us AFTER we had finished our lunch.

A conversation went like this.

DK "have you guys gone to Pat Pong?"

AO "yeah. go there watch thai girl show."

NW "TIGER? AS IN REAL TIGER?"

DK "yeah, like they show thai girls doing tricks with their... erm..."

NW "WHAT TRICKS? THEY TEACH THE TIGER TRICKS?"

AO "THAI GIRL. THAILAND GIRL. NOT TIGER."

No offense late bloomer.

When I was doing some readings...

Hey are u blogging more because you found out that there are other people reading your blog?

Yar.

So you’re blogging more to entertain them?

Yar.

And in the past 2 days you haven’t been blogging?

Yar.

Why?

What?

Did you even listen to what I was saying? (Giving me the Medusa stare made famous by ***)

Now I am! (At full attention)