Idle Thoughts

driving my girlfriend home today and after i dropped her off i was driving home. not wanting to drive home listening to my car's engine and my own breathing, i turned on the radio. there was some show conducted my carrie chong and she was giving away 4 free tickets, all you have to do was to be the number x caller and you'll win the prize. simple.

some dickhead managed to call through and carrie chong asked him what he was going to do with tickets, he said he didnt know what they were... can u imagine that, u call in for free tickets JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE FREE and not because u want to go... u bloody stinking mother fucking piece of shit. anyways, carrie chong decided to be funny and asked him to give her ONE good reason why she should give him the tickets...

he said," because i just completed my3 month BMT and i have the next 4 days off, so i could use the tickets..."

CC, dripping with sacarism," THE PARTY IS ON THE 29 OF SEPTEMBER... , come on give me another good reason!"

LOSER," my birthday is coming soon..." (he incidentally sounded extremely sheepish.)

CC," when?"

LOSER," october..."

CC," i'm gonna give u the party tickets just so that everyone else can hate you."

i love that girl.



Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
oei dragon
Puff says:
ROAR
Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
dragons dun roar
Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
you dink
Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
ahhaah
Puff says:
*FLAMES*
Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
no you puff
Jemy: tell no more lies. hurting deep from too many cuts says:
puff the dragon
Puff says:
......................................

the many intellectual conversations i have with my friends...

Nano

i heard the funniest joke yesterday. daniel bought an ipod nano and he was rushing to show it off to me, the bastard!! okay, i was dying to take a look at it after buying my zen neeon 3 weeks ago and i wanted to check out the competition to at least console myself that i made a good choice. damn. the nano is just so... nano... it's like a "book mark" quoting daniel. plus it does LOOK quite sleek, futuristic and state of the art. anyways, my neeon has a BIGGER storage space and i can change my skin so i will not have to stick to boring white front and silver background... fuck it sounds damn lame but i make do with what i have. back to the joke.

behind daniel there were 2 of his friends. one boy and one girl. hur hur hur. anyways... we were all standing around and daniel was showing off his NANO to me and the guy said," look, NANO NEI NEI (slang for breast)." while pointing to the other girls' breast.

NANO NEI NEI

i died on the spot. if it wasnt for the fact that i didnt know the guy and girl i would most definately burst out laughing at his boob joke. haha! nano nei nei. it was mother fucking hilarious. and i wonder at how on earth did he come up with such a joke. i can think of at least 5 girls i would like to go up to and say, " EEEEEEeeeeeee NANO NEI NEI!!!". hahahaha! the joys of being a fucker.

my friend was tired and didnt want to go out. yue and i were out in town waiting for him to decide whether he was coming to meet us or not but he WAS supposed to meet us. while the 2 of us were arguing on the phone yue suddenly said," tell him dun so BO BALLS lah! come down meet us NOW."

BO BALLS.

the net result of someone who didnt know the meaning of bo ji and had a literal translation of its meaning - BO BALLS. it means no balls.

thinking about both names then i ask this, would a guy be more offended if someone said he was BO BALLS or if someone said he had NANO BALLS. personally i would be more offended (if offended could be used to describe my feelings, i would not care actually but if asked to judge...) if someone said i had NANO BALLS.

it's an attack against my manhood, my family jewels, my MOJO. i mean i would rather u say i have no balls, at least then i know that ur joking and that i know i have balls, then u say i have NANO BALLS. then it places a self doubt about whether my balls are really sub sized.

alternatively, what if someone were to comment on a girl? would you be more offended if someone said you had NANO NEI NEI or BO BOOB? and no, no - i dun care what ever my cup size is cause we all know that you DO care whether u have big or small boobs... small is nice and cute and sweet but too small is just wrong. hahaha! wrong.

if it's too small then u own liao. no one wants you. haha! i keed i keed!

but then again almost of the nano nei nei gals i know are single and readily avalible? okay, they're single. now u know who you are!

so the basic qns... would u be branded not to have something or to have someone say u do have something but that it's so small it's.....

NANO.

One finger

Puff says:
u type damn loud
Puff says:
can u type softly
bloated says:
one finger mah

this is the 1st time i've heard that... 1 finger makes u type louder. what's the science behind that... that ur using ur fattest finger to type when ur using 1 finger...?! or is ur hand that heavy that u cannot control the up and down movement making it so loud as u clamp down and smash the key board...

I KEED.

Parents

i dun understand my parents. they are waiting for their friend to pick them up at 1845. at 1840 they are sitting outside the house waiting for them with all the gates behind them locked. i stay in a terrace house. its like 10 s from the hall to the place that they are sitting at. my question is why cant they sit in the hall and go out when their friend reaches. it's not like losing that 10 s will cost them their friendship... old people.

On a midnight dreary

ny friend just had his car wheel clamped at bishan 8, it's no suprise since his car blocked HALF then entrance to the car park. anyways he was broke and then he decided to go draw some money as there was a sig that said WARNING! wheel-clamp area etc etc release fee: $100. BESIDE his car... (i mean with a sign that size beside ur car, u still parked there. who the hell cares if it was for 5 mins which u claimed or the 30 mins that u probably took... ur screwed.)

so upon a midnight dreary as he pondered weak and weary, he trudged and made his way to JUNCTION 8 where he promptly drew out $80 as he had $20 in his wallet. phase 1 of the mission accomplished, he then walked back to bishan 8 to find the guard where he tried to argue his way out if it(to no avail of course), and then proceeded to pay the guard $100 to remove the clamp. the guard looked at him, SMILED and said, " son, it's $105. $5 gst charge." my friend died.

eating lunch with "friend" of mine is the most grueling experience, let's call him G for simplicitie's sake and for my own sanity least he discovers my blog which i think he has. haha. screw u son of a bitch! he is a pain in the ass. he cannot order alone, he cannot order with me, he has to prove that he is more "MAN" than me and he has to prove a god damn fucking point that he is closer to the other guy that we're having lunch with. LIKE I GIVE A FUCKING DAMN! dont u think if i wanted to be closer to the guy i would TRY to talk to him more. how about i don't really care and so leave me alone for crying out loud. 1, i do not want to go for lunch with you. 2, u do not leave me a choice when u ask me out for lunch 1 week in advance. i feel it is a simple case of low self esteem. thus, the need to assert yourself at every availble opportunity. the need to feel needed and the need to feel important. i pity your sad and miserable 22 years of existance, that at the end of 22 yrs of life you cannot find your own nitch in life, that you cannot be happy with what you've got, that you cannot even find some sembalance of self worth. instead, you go around leaching yourself on to people you call your "BROTHERS" that half of them do not want you around. now are you aware of that! of course you aren't since your "brothers" that i am not close to tell me how irritating you are and god damn shitty being around you can be. of course you will not believe me since you are MR POPULAR. haha, stop deluding yourself PLEASE.

you prick. if it were not for ur "brother" asking me to join him and you for lunch i would not go. and it is no secret that he does NOT want to be eating lunch alone with you.

My Heart's Not In It

i need a direction in my life.

wondering around aimlessly will only get you so far.

time for a paradigm shift.

i hope.

Genius

i've recently once again discovered the fine art of priracy. aka, downloading files from the internet, now of course as you all know this is against the law and i am a strong advocate for purchasing the originals and shame on all you pirates out there who deserve nothing more than the full and impartial iron fist of the law smashing u inside it's palm of justice.

of course i would never do something so despicable and low down as that, it is an act for animals, babarians, mats and of course joyceisdamncools... i signed up for the many LEGAL music, anime etc etc sites and i'm downloading songs and animes like crazy. to my dismay i discovered my internet connection can go to a maximum of 60 kbs... and there's just too many anime to download... too many for my pathetic 60 kbs to download... in the midst of my despair, the darkest of my moments my trusted IBM think pad brought forth a ray of light.

i now know why it's called a think pad. because it can THINK.

if switched the wireless network to a ficlke and unreliable network with a much higher broadband rate. this got me thinking... if i use my network to download and another net work to download again... i'll effectively be doubling my downloading speed.

HAHAHAHA.

i love my thinkpad. of course i'm not saying that i'm doing that. it's down right despicable and i would most certainly not stoop to such depths to watch some anime that is made for kids.. no... of course i would not do that. i'll just content myself to my own broadband connection and not be a theif to steal other people's internet connection.

in the middle of the night,
i go walking in my sleep.
through the valley of fear,
to a river so deep.
i've been searching for something,
taken out of my soul
something i would never lose.
something somebody stole.

We all end in the ocean
We all start in the streams
We're all carried along
By the river of dreams

The Importance Of Being Earnst

I sold my soul for the second time
Cos the man, it dont pay me
I begged my landlord for some more time
He said son, the bill is waiting
My best friend called me the other night
He said MATE, are you crazy?
My girlfriend told me to get a life
She said boy, are you lazy

But I dont mind
As long as theres a bed beneath the stars that shine
I'll be fineIf you give me a minute
A man's got a limit
I can't get a life if my heart's not in it
I dont mind
As long as theres a bed beneath the stars that shine
Ill be fineIf you give me a minute
A man's got a limit
I can't get a life if my heart's not in it

I lost my faith in the summertime
Cos it dont stop raining
The sky all day is as black as night
But I'm not complaining
I begged my doctor for one more line
He said son, words fail me
It aint no place to be killin' time
I guess I'm just lazy

I dont mind
As long as theres a bed beneath the stars that shine
I'll be fineIf you give me a minute
A man's got a limit
I can't get a life if my heart's not in it

World Trade Centre

i thought this picture was really well done.



and this as well. number 3 is a personal favorite haha

I CANNOT SEE MY BLOG

i cannot see my blog. plain and simple. when it loads, it's just ONE BIG BLACK PAGE with nothing on it. just the darkness. it's annoying, irritating and most distressing. the worst part is other people can read it. all except me. what kind of logic is that. it's as good as saying the whole world can drive MY car except ME.

don't ask me why it is that way. do not ask me what i did to make it one blank page. and do not ask me am i sure i didnt do anything. because i am COCKSURE that i did NOT do anything. 1 moment i could load the page and the next i couldn't, and i tried again but nobody's home. i tried again and again and again but still no one's home. WHAT IS HAPPENING...

there's this gal who looks like ai qi. i dare use her name because i am COCKSURE that out of the ten plus or minus people that regularly read my blog, not 1 of you know her. hahaha! well maybe except for the BIG C. she's aka swan. but of course the real one is a) smarter b) prettier c) infinately more unapproachble. okay, the last one i take back. when i was in sec 4 i DID managed to get her home number, now how cool is that. her god damn bloody home number. HAHAHAHA. what an achievement. *slap slap* (me giving myself a pat on the back.

i must say i am the envy of most guys. my gf's a hottie. she's so hot she sizzles. HAHAHA. please! I KEED! I KEED!

okay i don't know where did that come from. it WILL NOT happen again.

i swear upon a summer's day.

HAHAHA.

erm... i dunno where did THAT come from.

my friend just told me that rugby sent out a 905kb mailer. and that we'll get into trouble cause it's too big. and we'll be in even deeper shit if students end up complaining...

i wonder what made him think that i give 2 shits.

SALSA DANCING PRICK!

DO I LOOK LIKE I FUCKING CARE?!?!

1, i did not send the mail

2, i am NOT the president.

3, even if i were, a simple SORRY I WILL NOT DO IT AGAIN will more than suffice.

GO TRY IT IF U DO NOT BELIEVE ME.

Tired

a number of my friends are having relationship problems lately. and i noticed those that do are born in the year of the pig. maybe it is a bad year for the pig.

but things are sure picking up for those born in the year of the dog, issues of the heart at least. as least for the people i know... does our birthdays really have something to do with our lives.

are our lives already planned out. if it is so then what is the use of us struggling to get ahead, to better our lives. we could just sit here and things would move. but if we did that logically we know that we're kinda screwed. is that then what fate has installed for us? are we able to change our fate or are our decisions already made up for us and us "making" that decision is not really a concious choice since we're already programmed to make that choice. but we cannot not make any choices and follow the flow. since by doing that we're already making a choice.

okay i'm lost now. maybe someone intended for me to get confused and leave things hanging. he probably knows i'll go fuck it man. so here it is. a self fulfilling prophecy. FUCK IT.

there, there was no man and it was in caps so u lose.

i win.

or did u intend for me to do all that as well.

MRT

taking the train once again has raise several issues once again. the most glaring one is this. why do singaporeans crowd around the train doors as if there a plague in the spaces between 2 doors. this might not seem to be a problem to many and i assume at least half of the people who read this do it. MOVE TO THE FUCKING CENTRE OF THE DAMN BLOODY FUCKING TRAIN. 1 it will not kill you to move it. 2 it will allow more people to board the train. 3 (applicable to guys) the good looking girls are usually at the centre of the train as they do not want to be crushed and "accidentally" molested. 4 you WILL be able to alight at your desired stop 5 people will stop calling you an inconsiderate son of a bitch.

the personalilty of the average singaporean. fucking selfish bunch of ass wipes. the other appalling act that puts me off, people thinking that they own a pole in the train. do they have no back bone that they have to slouch and place the entire length of their body (from the neck down to the ass crack) on the pole. do they not know that other people MIGHT need to hold on to the pole to. and that ass had the gall to stare at me when i told him NOT to lean on the pole. which was followed (after the staring) quickly with a fuck you. you do not own the pole. ask your girlfriend if you do not believe me. which was continued with more glaring and a peturbed girlfriend pulling her wimpy slinky backed boyfriend away. i must say, 1 for me! and none for the average oh i'm so scared to die and of trouble singaporean. somethings are not worth fighting for, no arguements about that. but singaporeans do not find ANYTHING worth fighting for. just let the whole world walk over you.

people sitting on the chairs. classic. they have mastered the art of you dun exist if you cannot establish eye contact with you. a scenario, a pregnant woman is standing in front of 3 people. a secondary school kid, a working class adult and an old man. no prizes for who gives up the seat to her. if you're thinking old man your right. the other 2 do 1) "sleep" 2) look right and left. anywhere except at the pregnant lady. 3)staring into space. i must say they have the brains of ostrichs. and what's the big deal about giving up a seat. it's just a seat...

What i do in class...

Attribution for achievement
b.weiner

attribution is a 3 stage process
1) behaviour is observed.
2) Behaviour is deliberate
3) Behaviour is attributed to internal or external causes.

Wah lao aye… who said this course was fun… I cal chophis balls off…core wat no choicei wanna kill somebody.
Let tht person be XXX. I THINK yyy(no not wai wai.) IS PRETTY OKLAH between u and her? Me. *DEAD* REALLY AH?OKOK
HAHAHAHAHA
SHE’S NOT MY KOIND OFPRETTY
NT VOLUPTOUS
IM NOT TALKING TO U
ASS
IDIOT
SPASTIC
MORONIC
WAH LAU, ME GO LOST WEIGHT OK


Achievement can be attributed to
1) effort
2) ability
3) task difficulty
4) luck
causal dimensions of behaviour are
1) locus of control
2) stability
3) controllability

internal external
stable ability task difficulty

unstable effort (controllable) luck/mood other actions






so much for note taking in class...

me go LOST weight... i didnt type that. the person i was talking todid. and we did the writing ON MICROSOFT WORD...

Fuck You

fuck you and have a nice day.

that phrase never ceases to make me smile. so angry, so full of hate, so feisty but yet happy, pleasant and nochalant. perfect. perfect for you you fucking tit licking, father fucking, rumour mongering whore of a bitch.

just so you didnt hear me good the 1st time. here it is. just for good measure. not that i think it'll affect you much.

plus the fact that your simply dumb and retarded.

you have the mental capacity of a sperm and the behaviour norm of a 3 yr old.

so keep that snout out of my affairs for once and for all.

may you live to a hundred. and spend everyday in agony, looking at your wasted, empty and fucked up life.

here it is,

"FUCK YOU and have a nice day."

funny how when you're talking about something that happened more than 10 years ago it still hurts. tears start clouding your vision and your mind starts to get heavy. the worst is when tears come unbidden, trickling down your face and you do not want people to see it.

but it just keeps flowing.

i believe some scars will always be there. so tender so soft that there is absolutely no defences should anyone push the button. thankfully it does not matter to me who says it.

as long as it's not me.

it's funny how i got into a fight a long time ago over someone who insulted you. but it's okay when i do it. i tell myself that i do not mean it.

i guess sometimes i do.

i used to say that i have only 1 soft spot. but that soft spot has harden and become more numb with each setting of the sun. but there was another spot. a spot so tender, so vulnuerable that i did not even know it existed. and now that i know it is there i wish that i never knew. the blissfullness of ignorance. i now know the beauty of ignorance is bliss. no wonder children are always so happy. they do not know what is installed for them.

It's Not The 1st Time

it's not the 1st time that you and your sisters of ours have moved my things without my consent. it's not the 1st time that my things have gone missing. and it's definately NOT the 1st time that i've proven that the things that go missing is NOT because of me.

you keep saying that i don't bother packing my room and putting things into perspective. how about for every 1 thing that i pack you and that grand masterplan of yours packs, repacks and REPACKAGES my things into little obscure bundles or big boxes that never once again sees the light of day. what reason therefore is there for me to pack my room when all your every going to do is take a look at it and decide that you do NOT like my layout. and when no one's around and my room is open to your violation you stroll into my room and change everything to your every whim and fancy.

you keep saying that i will forget the things you ask me to do. well name me a time. you might as well couldn't and you couldn't. all you could say was last time. LAST TIME. what kind of answer is last time. you might as well say that everyone in this world will die because EVERYONE DIES. it has reached the point where i do not even bother trying. i'll just do it and leave the house. least you reach home and discover something else that this god-forsakened son has not done well.

you come and tell me to buck up and give me a 45 min lecture on me not doing well in school. HELLO. earth to apollo. IT SAYS GOOD ACADEMIC STANDING. which might not really be good BUT at least it's not bad. but no, it's not good enough. you daughter is the pride and joy. how about she graduated with not even a 2nd lower... it does not strike or occur to you because she's from rjc. she's from rgs and she's been closer to the top all the way than i ever was. BUT SHE DID NOT GET 2ND LOWER. at least I AM GONNA TO GET THE LOWEST MERIT. but you probably would not even notice. you wouldn't even care. you never care. never.

you cannot imagine the humilitation and pain of a primary 4 kid who has received a colours award and is attending the celebration lunch for the awardees and their parents. when a kid without a SINGLE parent, who won an award is told off by a teacher for stealing the food. she had the gall to threaten to call my parents, looking back i would have asked her to call you. just to see what kind of excuse you would give to cover your lack of reason for the failure to attend you own son's award ceremony. and you have attended your daughter's award presentations. i can only conclude that i never mattered. maybe i was always the failure, the loser and the underachiever. but i'm fucking in the university and when you compare that to your entire family that makes 2. your daugther AND ME. out of all the nephews and nieces that you have NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM MADE IT.

but it's still not enough.

it never is enough. till i'm dead and gone and the world does not matter. then it is enough.

it has to be enough.

A Full Circle

Did you know that the zen neeon has a 3 second lag time between switching songs. that is to say that when a song is playing halfway and u decide to change the song, there's a 3 second lag time.

did you know that there is no lag between the end of a song and a start of a song.

did you know that the zen neeon can only read up to 3 folders. meaning if u copied a file c:/adrian's music/kate bush/unknow album/wuthering heights.mp3 . i will not be able to play the song because the zen neeon cannot display/comprehend/show the song. and the song IS NOT in the data base.

BUT you can see and play the song when u plug it into a computer.

did you know that women gossip about nothing and everything for no particular reason.

and that guys do the exact same thing.

BUT guys tend to do it in a discret and quiet way.

they also tend not to let women know. just to be on the safe side.

did you know that the zen neeon does not come with a plug in charger.

and you HAVE to plug it into your computer to charge it.

to make matters worst, your computer HAS to be switched ON.

and the zen neeon's reset button is so small you have to use a REALLY TWEENY WEENY ISSIY BITSY pin to press it.

and i only knew that because my zen neeon hanged.

did you know i was so pissed when it hanged and i didnt know how to reset it i called them up and asked them how do i reset it.

and i felt so sheepish when they told me...

that i deleted EVERYTHING in my zen neeon at least 6 times.

and that i copied everything back inside at least 7 times.

did you know that if your wondering why did i delete things 6 times and copied them 7 times i think you are really dumb.

and most importantly, i think that the zen neeon is the bestesst piece of electronic thing that i bought since my laptop.

Paint It Black

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
I see a line of cars and they’re all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens ev’ry day
I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and it has been painted black
Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts
It’s not easy facin’ up when your whole world is black

No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you
If I look hard enough into the settin’ sun
My love will laugh with me before the mornin’ comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
Hmm, hmm, hmm,...
I wanna see it painted, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah!

someone once said, "despite all his gruff exterior and tough acting, if u take his heart and scratch it with a penknife you'll see gold underneath."

that was 5 years ago.

would you say the same thing now.

She Don't Use Jelly

i know a girl who thinks of ghosts
she'll make ya breakfast
she'll make ya toast
she don't use butter
she don't use cheese
she don't use jelly
or any of these
she uses vaseline
vaseline
vaseline

i know a guy who goes to shows
when he's at home and he blows his nose
he don't use tissues or his sleeve
he don't use napkins or any of these
he uses magazines
magazines
magazines
magazines
magazines


i know a girl who reminds me of cher
(reminds me of cher)
she's always changing
(she's always changing)
the color of her hair
(color of her hair)
she don't use nothing
that ya buy at the store
she likes her hair to be real orange
she uses tangerines
tangerines
tangerines
tangerines
tangerines
tangerines

for starters, i would dedicate this post to my new found love. my current other half. the one that is there for me when no one else is there. for the one that keeps me company when no one else is around and the one that entertains me non-stop. my baby. as u know, she is








my ZEN NEEON!

did i disappoint you? HAHAHA.

oops.

without my zen neon i would not have heard plenty of nice songs that i have been neglecting for so long. songs that i probably would never pay attention to. songs that have been passed to me by by and joyce. it's amazing how songs can sound so different when you're just playing them on your computer while chatting away or doing work as compared to when your taking a train to town and you're actually listening to the song instead of hearing the song. the lyrics to this song is absurd. it's weird, out of this world and simply unheard of, a girl who cooks using vasline, a guy who uses magazines to wipe his noose and the crazy idea of using tangerines (they're oranges if i'm not wrong...) to colour your hair orange. it's just so smart, i wonder what the hell goes on inside that head of his. haha. the flaming lips, what a name.

the zen neeon hung for the 1st time. 1 day after its purchase, now i'm not saying it's lousy, i'm just warning all future zen neeon users to not select too many different play lists in too short a time. the processing speed is simply not up to standard. BUT, if u "browse" (that's the function in the player) u can scroll as many times as u like, it doesnt hang. it's a long story, one that i'm 1) am not inclined to explain. 2) cannot be bothered to 3) do not see the need to 4)pure lazy and 5) i probably cannot put it into words. (this is the strongest reason.)

but it is HOW COOL LAH! the zen neeon. it's one hella player. in fact, i think it's the only player that can get u laid. and it works for all girls. meet a tough nut to crack? just change the skin on the player to suit the nut. it's like the universal nut cracker. cracks all nuts, just change the skin.

i'm beginning to enjoy taking the train to school. and the main reason for that is that i get to use my

come on, u know what i'm gonna say.

everybody, together now!

THAT'S IT!

ZEN NEEON! (that has a mighty gay looking cover with a lime green backing. creative calls it yellow for lack of imagination i presume.)

every bought something or got something as a gift and u JUST HAD TO use it. like no matter what, as long as u can use it u will use it feeling? if u hadnt then good for that sad, pathetic, miserable and plain sucky life that u had. a life that has had no excitement, no anticipation and no childhood. anyhows, it's THAT feeling. i dun turn the sound on my computer on anymore. winamp's outta the window. if i'm surfing the net, the headphones of the zen neeon is in my ears. if i'm cooking something, the zen neeon's plugged in. if i'm taking a shit,i know that at least i'm listening to good music.

the relentless pursuit of perfection.

that motto is just so perfect. my goodness.the mind that came up with that line. i'm wondering, did that guy come up with that on the spur of the moment or did he wrack his brains trying to come out with something like that. even if he did wrack his brains, it's just so perfect it is worth it.

It's nice

i did the most retarded thing today.

i bought a zen neeon on impluse.

granted it's damn nice.

it lags.

it's nice.

it's still charging.

i blew the money i was supposed to pay my hp bills with on it instead.

i'm dead.

it's still nice.

i told the guy i wanted the one with the yellow back. he glared at me in disbelief. he kept checking with the other stores even though i told him it was fine. i paid for it. he told me there's blue, dark blue, RED and orange. i told him, yellow is really fine. i like it... he looked at me like i was outta my mind.

fuck him.

i'm still fucked.

and it's still nice.

Not By A Long Shot

when i was younger and the grass was greener, sweeter and fresher. when the seas were clear and blue, the mountains... when we still had mountains in singapore a group of 4 nubile boys wondered when will all 4 of them get attached. those were the days, of racing bikes and kicking balls. of indiscriminate friendship and easy commaraderie.

we called ourselves many things. many i am not too proud to disclose, cheesy and orbit hits them dead on the head. yesterday one of them, alvin, told me,"hey for the 1st time all 4 of us are attached!" me,"uh huh. now that u mentioned it, i think so. wait is yx still attached?" alv,"yeah. confirm."

today as i was talking to jh in the futile attempt to organise a dinner where everyone will be there, i discovered he had just broken up. ha! a poo on u alv. looks like it isnt time for that yet. not by a long shot.

alv's gf was rambling on and on abt things of no consequence when she popped the qns and asked abt me and my other half. she said," alv says it just cyclical" i almost choked when i heard that. but with skill and the ability to change the direction of the topic that comes with years and years of practice and failed attempts (in acs(I)) me and alvin seamlessly changed the topic, so fast, so abruptly, so smoothly. u'll think u were watching ocean's 11. haha. yes, i believe it's a ac thing. the ability to poo on u and make u think that we're rocket scientist. magical. of course it doesnt work with close friends. all too often no one believes me now. not even when i'm serious, i mean everyone knows that the bmw symbolises and aeroplane engine against the sky RIGHT. and that's significant because after the war, bmw was not allowed to make planes anymore but in order not to lose their heritage they made their logo such that it'll be a constant reminder of their proud heritage. of course u knew that. and if u didnt, now u know. it's TRUE.

that above example is different from this senario - linc is using a the microwave to cook lasagna (which is clearly stated non-microwavable which he bought without checking...). hey adrian," how many minutes did u put them in for?" me," abt 8. then at 5 u must open it and blow into the microwave. this is to blow all the steam out of the microwave then u close it and finish it off with the other 3 minutes." and he actually stopped it after 5 minutes and blew into it. HAHAHAHA. i just had to see him do that. after he did that and i laughed my ass off. linc," u bloody mother fucker." me," not by a long shot sucker."

Driven

the days of driving to school are over. gone are the days i can proudly brag that it takes me 7 fucking minutes to get to class. to class. not to school. to class. sigh.

i really wonder whether the move to the city campus is a good thing. sure, there are tons of good things about it, the facilitaies, the convenience and of course the location. the location. smack right in the heart of the city. but it's all the good things that u hear. surely not everyone is happy with the city campus. for one, being right smack in the middle of the fucking god forsaken city has done nothing for me. in fact, i hate it. for one, everything's fucking expensive, sure, blame it on the rental and stuff. but doesnt the school decide how much to charge for rental? or do we have to pay rental to moe every year for using it's highly acclaimed CITY CAMPUS. A POO ON U. food's gone up. not that it was ever low to begin with. now, it's just higher.

being in such close proximity to orchard road does not make things better for me. for 1 i KNOW that i'll be spending a lot more time doing things that i shldnt be doing, it's not like i havent been doing it but now that i'm actually there already just makes it all the less sinful. in fact, it actually makes going to town and whittling my time away seem justified. since i'm already there i might as well make full use of it. that logic is just flawed but then the young always think they live forever and i always think that there's always tommorrow. and ever since i made up my mind to not drive to school (i did want to drive to school and i secured parking for my car that costs me 60 a month. yes 60 a month. beat that. ha! but then my beloved mother and sister made me drive to school in the morning. park at the place i was gonna be parking at and walk to school. it took me the better park of 40 minutes. the car park was bloody far from school, a good 10 min brisk walk. fuck. and just so to prove their point, they made me then take a god damn bloody mother fucking train to school and WALK to the offices again. JUST TO PROVE THEIR POINT. yes it is faster, by a good 10-20 minutes. ur point is made. i wonder whether they actually did the test before they made me do it but i do not want to know. what i didnt know didnt hurt me. now i know that im not driving and yes, it hurts. like an arrow through my heart. stick a knife into my arse and twist it around. take a fire hydrant and smash it against my head. repeatedly. yes, i'm not driving to school next sem. goodbye to all my friends. i shall start school afresh. friendless. right joyce? anyways, i lost my best case for drivin to school. fuck.), gone is the headache of finding a parking lot in town, how much parking is gonna cost, the ever steadily rising prices of petrol, the exhorbitant rates of erp during the morning peak period. i will spend more time in town. since ORCHARD IS NEARER TO BISHAN THAN CITY HALL. it is ALONG the way home. so what's stopping me...

granted education is cheaper for those of us in singapore and the cost of living here is lower than the most places. but isnt that the point, to keep prices here low for the masses. the prices at smu is retard and who is going to stop the price rise or place a cap on things if they can get away ripping off students. if u can rip students off who is going to give 2 shits about things should u start ripping the working class off...

which brings me to another point. dun u find it funny how petrol company raise their prices. they do it in 3 simple steps. 1) raise the price by a few cents. 2) give a huge discount. 3) slowly cut back on the discount. then, they repeat steps 1,2,3 again and again and again. an example, the price of 1 litre of shell 95 now is the price of shell V-Power when i 1st started driving. that's a good 20 cents. 20 cents over 2 years. it's not much u might say but just think, if a 1.6 car has a fuel tank of 40 litres, 20 cents means 8 dollars more per tank. u pump 4 full tanks in a month, 32 dollars. 12 months = a lot of money. and the thing is the media is so behind them. when was the last time u heard of petrol prices being raised in singapore and when u do it's nicely glossed over. take it in comparison to how much you hear about crude oil prices rising in the states. brillant propaganda machine at work.

another case of brilliant propaganda at work, go pay a little attention to mr andrew kuan. it's classic how pap slaughtered him. the kill him for one. and for good measure, they buried him 6 feet under just in case. for crying out loud he's facing a law suit... just because he wanted to be the president.

Changes

to date i have bought a brown bed, a brown sofa bed. i'm decidedly undergoing a brown-revolution. in addition to that, i've painted the walls of my room. gone are the turquoise walls that have haunted me since i was 6. now, it's light brown, to add volume and depth to my room, 2 walls are a darker shade of brown while the other 2 is a lighter shade.

nice.

brown is nice.

it matches the colour of my latino skin.

oh, sin city and lego posters adorn my bare and cold walls now. adding a touch of zest and life to the room. sin city is wack! jessica alba can rock my boat any day of the week, any hour of the day, any minute of the hour, any second of the minute! u get my drift...

my mom asked me," boy, why everytime u got girlfriend u cover ur door with a poster?(my door has glass panels that allows 2 way vision.)"

i looked at her, stunned and replied," then why everytime i dun have a girlfriend u go and take it down..."

she smiled and said," then i can see what ur doing in the room mah..."

i asked myself was that a hint? i dunno and i dun care. the poster's staying there for as long as i like. it's not like i got things to hide BUT who wants their mom walking in on them when ur kissing or hugging each other... PLEASE.

i found the bear THE BIG C wanted back so badly. abit late cause i've paid for not being able to find it, i now think it was a test, a test to see if i had it. BECAUSE AFTER i found that that #%#^$^ has refused to come and collect it from me... it's as if she wants ME to deliever it to her... like COME ON. u want it back u take it back... repeated attempts to get her to let me know when do i passed it to her has failed,note, it's WHEN DO I PASS IT TO HER, aka i'm gonna bring it to her...

women, they give u a drop and expect the world in return.

BLUT has discovered that she owes me 183.04. fucking blut... i told her. no it's 183.1083. HA. fucking hell. eat sperms and die. it's amazing. and all of us wants to know how she came to the conclusion that i owed the rest more money than her... but of course that blut's a sly one. too much thoughts of sex, sperms and STDS going through her head. hope she get's them all.

EVIL.

but i dun really care.

die bitch die. she tried to sms linc,"hey saw this competition and thought u might be taking part. good luck."

what a horny blut, u wun even let off a man if GOD. die bitch die.

every heard of city harvest? their harvesting all the money out of the poor, ugly and weird fanatics they have there. i know this gal who earns 2k. she gives her mom 200, keeps 300 and gives the rest to them. OMG!!! what the hell man. i'm so going into ministry next time, THE WORDS GOLD MINE echoes in my head. FRIENDS! FANAATICCSS! LOSERS!!! GIVE ME UR MONEY!

Gin Blossoms

Till I Hear It From You

I didn’t ask
They shouldn’t have told me
At first I’d laugh, but now
It’s sinking in fast
Whatever they’ve sold me
Well baby I don’t want to take advice from fools
I’ll just figure everything is cool
Until I hear it from you
It gets hard
The memory’s faded
Who gets what they say
It’s likely they’re just jealous and jaded
Well maybe I don’t want to take advice from fools
I’ll just figure everything is cool
Until I hear it from you
Until I hear it from you
I can’t let it get me off
Or break up my train of thought
As far as I know, nothing’s wrong
Until I hear it from you
Still thinking about not living without it
Outside looking in
Til we’re talking about it, not stepping around it
Maybe I don’t want to take advice from fools
I’ll just figure everything is cool
Until I hear it from you...

Thesis

i have a thesis. a thesis that i painsaking developed after studying the pain, emotional trama and severity of vehicle pile ups. and upon deeper analysis and thought, i have discovered the true cause of vehicle pile ups. all current and future drivers take heed. ignore this at ur own peril and rue the day u thought i was sprouting nonsense when ur involved in a vehicle pile up. when ur trying to convinced the insurance company that u had come to a complete stop BEFORE the mother fucking son of a bloody bitch banged ur ass causing u to surge forward, turning u into the mother fucking son of a bloody bitch that banged the ass of the guy infront of u. there and then u'll probably think back, if only i took him seriously. but then, if we lived in a world where u could say if and then u'll get a 2nd chance, life would be that much less worth living.

when ur driving and u see the red brake lights of the car in front of u flash, ur immediate reaction would be to slow down too. correct me if i'm wrong. no, if u think i'm wrong then stop reading. click the cross at the top right hand corner of this page. should the car infront of u start to loss speed at a drastic rate, are u able to notice it right away. is ur reaction time to that the same as when u see his brake light flashing. the answer is no. ur reaction time would be slower, aff? it is slower due to 2 reasons. 1st, it has been programed into u by hundreds of hours of driving that when u see the person infront of u slow down, u automatically slow down too. and that is triggered by red brake lights flashing. therefore, no red brake lights flashing, no signal to tell u to brake. 2nd, the purpose of the red brake lights are to inform u immediately that the person is stepping on the brakes, thus alerting u to any sudden or gradual speed cuts. this is because the average human being, while driving is not focused 100% on the car in front of him(unless ur learning or a irritating p-plater...) as he has to judge the road conditions, check his rear mirrors, side mirrors, whether his gf has replied his sms, see whether his hair is out of shape, put on his sunglasses, pick up a call etc etc. thus, if the car in front of u loses speed rapidly u will take a longer time to notice it.

let us now look at the senario of a pile up. 1st car jam breaks, causing the car behind to bang into it, causing the car behind to bang into it and the car behind it to bang into it etc etc. there might be cases where one car (A) actually stops BEFORE hitting the car infront of it but the car (B) behind that sharp assed driving is not as sharp and he (B) bangs into him(A) causing him(A) to bang into the car which he(A) has just avoided banging into(i know it sounds confusing, read it slowly. wait, i'll add alphabets to make it easier.) of course the further u are from the car in front of u the more reaction time u will have but let's face it, how far are u from the car in front of u when ur travelling at 30km/h. 2 car lengths? fuck u. i'm not saying it does not have a part to play but u will be nearer to the guy in front of u when u are driving slowly.

thus, the 1st car jam breaks, the guy behind is having a hand job from his gf and fails to notice that the car infront has stopped. he smashes into him. the person BEHIND him however is happily cruising at a "safe" distance and suddenly, the fucker in front is not moving! like fucking hell he just stopped. he slams on the breaks but it isnt fast nuff to stop.

wala! now u have a 3 car pile up.

repeat the process serveral more times and u have a 4, 5, 6 car pile up.

how do u avoid such predicaments. u just have to be skilled, have excellent judgement and have reflexes faster than a leopard. like UH HUM! haha.

or u can just drive like a prick.

Bleached

i'm nudergoing an anime craze.

again.

naruto

prince of tennis

scryed

samurai deeper

full metal panic

macross zero

shadow skill

gundam

bleach

are the more outstanding ones that i've remembered. some of them are completed, while others are not. but one thing's for sure, i tot i overcame the anime craze at the begnning of the holidays. i was wrong. i was waiting for more anime to come into my greedy paws. i managed to get the latest episodes of naruto and bleach from by who in turn got it from her brother who in turn got it from somebody on the internet. or at least that's what i think. in 3 days i've finished watching 10 episodes of naruto. 14 episodes of bleach and 9 episodes of full metal alchemist. what the hell i say. what the hell i say again. i'm a fucking anime addict and i'm proud of it. my social life has been put on hold and i aint bothered. not 1 puny bit.

why are people always so concerned about what goes on in other people's lives. are their lives so empty, so incomplete that they have to dig their nosy snouts into the business of other people so that they can fill some sense of fulfilment? that by digging out something of another person they have somehow achieved a sense of victory. they have used their wit and ingenuity to gain a morsel of information in order to gain power? or is it just plain and simply interesting for them. does it truly matter what goes on in people's lives?

why dun u take a fucking look in the mirror and count the number of true friends u have. friends who u know at a moment's phone call will come down to ur aid regardless of what they are doing and where they are. spend ur time making friends such as these than go poking ur nose into other people's business.

i've had enough of acquaintances to last 10 lifetimes. no i do not doubt their importance and value but they are just what they are.

acquaintances. (how many people can spell acquaintances...)

so instead of spending ur time findong out juciy, interesting and ultimately irrelevant bits about other people's lives. just spend some time looking inward and discover what an empty fucked up husk of a human being u are. and if u had bothered to do that. spend just that little more effort to change urself for the betterment of society.

least u become a burden and a parasite to us all.

Our Little Secret

the palm-lined streets of LA and san diego eventually gave way to vegas glitz, which morphed into old world san fransiscan charm as we traversed the vast expanse of the states via highways and convoluted byways, one long day melding into another, the warm sun constantly nipping at our heels, and the nights a welcome cool respite. we were nourished by a steady diet of oversized burgers, mexican fare and diet soda, overwhelmed by mammoth malls, dwarfed by the majesty of the grand canyon, traumatised by an over-excess of heavy metal (just so we could catch dream theater live), and awed by the heft of the average american. and through it all, i had the bestest company possible.

yes, you're my wonderwall =).

Tony Pepperoni

a mexican woman came up to me at a mall in san diego asking me for a light. she was speaking in spanish and i was looking at her with the what the fucking hell are u saying face. i said," can u speak english? i dun understand spanish... "

she said," ur parents didnt teach u spanish? u better learn and not lose ur heritage. "

i replied," u think i'm spanish?"

she quietly mumbled," u not mexican?"

me," i'm CHINESE. ni hao mah?"

estatic, i proudly proclaimed to BY that someone thought i was spanish...

she said that she always thought i looked mat... mat...

mat...

the words echoed through my head. i was dumbfounded, hurt and crushed.

she went on to call me.

ricky nanchos.

tony pepperoni.

adriano burrito.

note that her vocabulary of names is limited to food. granted she said that if anyone thought i was italian she wld call me tony pepperoni.

ricky nanchos...

like an arrow through my heart.

Treading Water

"it's not like u took his fish after he's caught it. the fish was there and u took it. whether knowingly or unknowingly it doesnt matter. what's done has been done."

this thought has been reverberating thru my mind. was i right or wrong. ethical or unethical. justified or not. did i know at the back of my mind and chose to ignore it. was i clueless to the hints or maybe just oblivious. maybe i suspected and tried to wringle an answer. alas, it was not to be. estatic and armed with newfound justification i moved forward. what use was there walking in circles or constantly looking back. time and tide waits for no man and opportunity only knocks once. was i to miss the rising of the dawn. i thought not. not with nothing substantial blocking my path. the door was open, all i had to do was bite the bullet and take the plunge.

there's been no regret thus far. concern and anxiety at times but definately no regret. perhaps i'm so jaded that nothing stirs me anymore but i beg to differ. i've figured different things make me tick now. u cant push the buttons u did 3 years ago and expect the same results, i'm no longer that same person. without a doubt everyone changes, how much is the question. i fear the day where i wake up and look into the mirror not recongise the person gazing back at me. what will i have become there. would i even notice that i've changed or simply glaze over it like we all do everyday.

they say u only live once, carpe diam.

that if u die trying to do that one thing that u always wanted to do. would u die without a single shred of regret. the sudden, complete and total loss of all other possibilities all traded for that moment of excitement, rush and sense of fulfilment. that it is worth it.

better to try and fail and then not try at all.

the only complete failure is the failure to try.

therein lies the question of what to try and what not to try. how then should we decide what to try.

THE GALL OF SOME PEOPLE

at the start of the trip blut so graciously offered to be the accountant for the trip. since we figured that there wld probably be plenty of shared items it wld be in everyone's best interests to keep a set of accounts. fine. so blut shall be the accountant.

this is the 1st case of financial fraud that i've experienced 1st had. and every morning i wake up and thank the lord that i'm reading accountancy and that he gave me awareness, quick thinking, an analytical mind, razor sharp thinking and the will power to overcome my laziness.

things seem a little funny when blut wanted to throw everything into the accounts book. things where we cld have just paid each other back on the spot blut wanted to put into accounts. ie, a dinner costing 20 bucks, now since i paid for t 1st, it isnt THAT hard to fucking take out 5 bucks from ur pocket and pay me back right? hmm.. maybe i was just being suspicious. well that's what i thought so i didnt bother much about it. the benefit of doubt was given to blut.

1st major incident that put me off. blut made a blantant comment that she owed by $x. and that i owed baoying $(x+100). she sounded so happy when she said that. i was appalled. i cldnt believe my ears. up to that point in time i might not have paid for many major items. but i was sure as hell that i freaking paid for more things that that bloody fucking stinking vagina leaking porn shop owner fetish bitch. while that stingy horny father and begger fucking slut refused to pay for anything, i did!! i was fuming. i did quick mental sums in my mind and i realised that it was not mathemathically possible for that fucking chee bye daughter of a whore to actually owe by less money than me. that got me checking the books (which literally a book... her diary).

reading the books made me really pissed. granted it was up to date but it was messy. and the individual accounts where how much each one owes one another was in a mess. it didnt make sense. try as i might i really cldnt make much sense of how she did her maths. numbers just magically appeared and the amounts just grew astronomically. the only thing that made sense was the records of what ever we paid, for what and how much.

the most amazing part of her accounts is that there is no page for her! me, linc and by have ours. blut's one is hidden somewhere in the abyss of her mother fucking diary. i refused (on moral grounds that it IS unethical to flip thru someone's diary.) to search her diary for her data since she so obviously restricted me to those few pages. i gave up. from that day onwards i just made sure that everything i spent on (ie, dinner, hotel bills etc etc) was recored in that book.

2nd incident.

fucking blut one night happily commented that i owed linc 137 (or so i remember ) more than her. maybe she didnt do it that way. but the bottom line is she had to tell me that i owed linc 137 big ones more than her.

i snapped.

"how on fucking earth can i possibly owe linc more money than u. i pay for more things than u and he does not share much with me. ARE U FUCKING SURE.(note, it was a statement rather than a question.)" she looks distraught, as if taken aback by the sheer mental capacity of me to THINK. the gall of that bitch. juts because i look like i dun give 2 shits . the fact that i seem trusting and that i MAKE u think i'm dumb does NOT mean that i dun give 2 shits, that i'm am trusting to a fault and that i am DUMB.

it's always good to have people underestimate u.

remember that.

she looks around, TWICE. and stutters, "i paid linc back $100. so u owe him more." point of fact, even if she did pay him back $100 i shld not owe him a $37 more. remember, she didnt pay for anything. i DID. TECHNICALLY, I SHLD OWE HIM LESS THAN $100 NOT $137 (this is with reference to blut of course.) u shld be getting my drift. unless ur dumb.

i gave her the eye and left it at that. the lion has awaken. no more shall thy hand thy tounge look like the innocent flower. but be the serpent neath!

on the day before she left us to go screw the porn shop owner, i asked her to let me photo copy the master copy on her diary. she fucking had the gall to tell me there was no need because she already copied it out BY HAND on a piece of paper and she calculated everything out for us already. all we had to do was follow her calculations. "HELLO EXCUSE ME. DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING PRICK TO U. DO I SEEM SO GULLIABLE TO U. DO U THINK THAT I WLD TRUST U. WHEN I FUCKING MET U FOR 4 WEEKS?

she said she wld pass it to me when she woke up. i said i'll fucking search ur bag till i get it NOW. she passed it to me reluctantly.

i made a copy.

she left.

after doing the accts i realised that the piece of paper that she gave me was empty. she wrote everything down. but left out how much we owed each other. in addition, she wrote down all the items that we paid for but she left out those items SHE paid for. what transparency... but why wld she leave out her own set of accounts?

conclusion:

she wanted us to pay for her. she wanted to doctor the accounts. the gall of some people. do not "ban men nou fu". DO NOTCHEAT AN ACCOUNTANT. please... she paid a grand total of 169 for everyone on the trip. i paid ard 740... SO HOW THE HELL DID I END UP OWING THE OTHERS MORE MONEY THAN SHE DID? for good measure, by paid like $2000 and linc $1500. she's amazing. i do not belive her... she hoped that we wld all take her word for it and just pay thru our noses and she wld than make a killing.

I HAVE HALF A MIND TO FUCKING TELL HER OFF.

THEN TELL HER BOYFRIEND SHE'S FUCKING ANOTHER GUY FULL TIME. AND ANOTHER 2 ONE NIGHT STANDS.

THEN TELL THE OTHER GUY WHO'S SHE IS FUCKING THAT SHE HAD 2 ONE NIGHT STANDS AND THAT HE'S NOT THE ONLY GUY WHO GOT LUCKY.

lucky, i mean UNlucky.

UN fucking LUCKY.

meanwhile i shall chant, STD, HIV, STD, HIV.

*blut = bitch+ slut

The Patriot

I never cease to amaze myself. i actually did plan to come back to beloved singapore on it's birthday, it's day of independence, the 1st time it was named an independent republic. national day. 9th of august. 1230 pm and i was back on singapore soil, back to home and no matter what everyone else might say i firmly believe that my visit to the states has made me so much prouder to be called singaporean.

let's see, they're pretty much colour blind in the states but racism still rears it's ugly head from time to time. at least in sunny singapore, i can always be assured that i wun be treated like a 2nd class citizen for the simple reason that I AM THE MAJORITY.

in the middle of the night i can stroll the streets of singapore without fear for my life and possessions. hell, even geylang is safe in the middle of the night.in fact, it is very safe if u stick to the main roads, when was the last time u heard that someone was killed or raped of mobbed at geylang... in the states however, it is completely different. once it's night fall it's almost completely deserted in the suburbs and the only city that has some sembalance of life is san fransico. call me paranoid or strange but hell was i scared in the suburbs. it's EMPTY. the irony, so many people but u dun see a single person in sight. the occasional car doesnt help either. even the petrol kiosks are manned. but aint no way ur gonna touch the people working there. they're all locked inside their offices. all the safer from potential robbers if u ask me. san fransico is worst, i stayed in the red light district and judging from the number of people sleeping on the streets u might think that the streets are the most comfy and warmst place to stay. i dun know about u but seeing so many homeless people on the streets in the middle of the night does unsettle me somewhat. maybe it's me. i think it's not.

call me chicken.

i rather be alive than dead.

i rather have my clothes and money with me than say tat i've had the experience of being mobbed.

the only thing that america has that singapore doesnt is the weather and the mountains. but as lee kuan yew has said, the air conditioner is the greatest invention of mankind and as i always say, every mountain looks the same. maybe this one is taller, redder, more plants on it etc etc. THEY'RE THE SAME. if i ever show u my pictures of the grand canyon u'll see. SAME

SAME.

SAME.

SAME.

maybe i'm unappreciative.

probably.

blut ran off with the porn shop guy again. hahah! we made a nice chat about stds after that. she was so quiet, i swear. like a giraffe. i wonder why was she so quiet. could u kids tell me why? *evil laughs*

blut left her bra in the hotel. linc found it and propmtly annouced to the whole room. btw, her bra is 90 percent padding. 10 percent boobs. after a careful inspection of her bra, i'm convinced. she's not an a cup. rather a square root a cup (smaller than a...). it's all padding, there was no space for boobs. HAHAHA. imagine that. A BRA THAT IS ALL PADDING AND NO SPACE FOR BOOBS. lol. it's what transvertites wear i think.

back to the story, after annoucing it he shouted i'm not taking it! i said me too! by just went , "well i'm not taking it too." it was at that moment i noticed semen stains on her bra!!! white semen stains. unless she produces milk, it's semen stains. on the semen stains were on the bra that she wore when she went to visit the porn shop owner. how do we know it was that bra? ans: she was parading round the room in it the night before. why? probably to seduce linc. why? she has leaking vagina syndrome.

that sealed her fate. aint no one was touching that bra. too bad. heard it cost between 50- 80 bucks. we all hope it's closer to 80.

at the aiport. blut," hey by! did u guys see my bra? i think i left it behind." by (with the look of utter innocent and plain disbelif.), "bra? what bra? no we didnt see anything. linc cleared the room." how smooth! u got to hand it to her. in 1 deft motion she managed to establish the fact that she had no connection to the bra and that linc was to be responsible for it. blut, sensing an easy kill went to linc," u didnt see any bra?" but linc was no lamb to the slaughter. summoning up all the training he has had from her past assaults. he calmly ignored her and started a conversation with 50 yr old women in front of him. he just ignored her. like she wasnt even there. it was hilarious.

no prizes for why she didnt even bother asking me.

STD

bitch is now known as SLUT.

she sneaked out of our hotel room at 3 in the morning and met her new porn shop boyfriend for sex.

she's meeting him again tonight and is spending the whole day with him tommorrow... u can only imagine what she must be doing.

STD!

STD!

STD!

she aint sharing any food with me anymore.

PERIOD.

me, "WHAT CAN BE OPEN AT 3 AM IN THE MORNING! WHERE CAN THEY GO SIA!" linc, " HER LEGS..."

THAT ONE GOT ME GOOD.

apparently her new bf called her to leave a msg,"hi juls, i'm jimmy. missing u loads already..... etc etc"

is he missing her or missing her vagina. or maybe he's just missing transfering his STDS to her.

i made a dare with by and linc today. they dared me to ask her how was her night last night. me, the moment she stepped into the room," HEY! HOW WAS SEX WITH THE PORN SHOP OWNER?" blut," IT WAS GREAT!" upon 2nd thoughts blut said," erm no lah, we didnt do anything..." YEAH MY FUCKING FLAMING BALLS.

made another dare with by. she dared me to make a snipe comment. as julia was leaving i shouted," USE PROTECTION! U NEVER KNOW WHAT U MIGHT CATCH!" blut,"....." she pretended she didnt hear me. me," USE PROTECTION!" blut," ..... (door slams behind her as she storms outta the room." LAUGHTER ECHOS THROUGHOUT THE ROOM.

blut was carrying tons of stuff as she was leaving the room. i used the trip that youngsters master in the trains. the "pretend to be sleeping so that u wld not have to give up ur seat ploy." mine was abit different. it was the "i'm looking at u struggle and i'm enjoying it + dun even try asking me for help look." linc glanced at her and glanced away. typical "out of sight out of mind tatic." by was just being by.

as we were leaving for the mall today, blut was in the toilet. linc (i duno whether it was done out of ignorance of spite) went," LET'S LEAVE WITHOUT HER. I DUN WANT TO WAIT FOR HER!" he nailed the final nail in the coffin with a slam dunk. by," shld we wait for her?" LINC AKA DA MAN, " I CANT BE BOTHERED!!!" AND THE TOILET DOOR WAS AJAR. ie, she cld fucking hear us talking , she can definately hear him shouting.

linc's analogy, she can fucking go off at 3am in the morning and come back at 10. and she spends the whole time laying and bed when she's knows we're going out. BITCH. i'm not gonna waste my time waiting for her.

my sentiments exactly.

we left.

linc is now singing "ONE NIGHT WITHOUT HER. woo hoo..."

he's also singing " HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HALLEUJAH!"

I'M SMILING AND BY'S SLEEPING.

home day after tommorrow.

night's senoritas.

How High Is Heaven

another 3 more days till i leave the states, today is one of the few days when we're back at the hotel before 10pm. it's partly due to the fact that we have actually booked our accomodation and also the fact that we booked our accomodation for the required number of days, thus, saving us the trouble of having to switch hotels because the hotel we're staying in has no more vacancies for us to extend our stay...

i've exceeded my budget for 1... quite the dead man walking. but it's hard not to exceed ur budget when ur budget does not include accomodation and car rentals. it was overlooked not due to my lack of forsight but rather the fact that my father CONVIENTLY decided not to give me money for that.

so be it. i'll just have to push the envelope and see how high is heaven. 1st sms to my mom. response favourable. 2nd sms to my mom. response favourable. 3rd sms to my mom. response was from my dad = not favourable. now, i've been reduced to eating instant noodles which my dad made me bring from singapore to buying microwave food to cook in our hotel. THANK GOD FOR THE INVENTION OF THE MIRCROWAVE. i cannot imagine life without u now. the nice hot and somehow flat looking burritos that cost $2.99 for 10. the shepard's pie that cost us $4, (WHICH BY DID NOT NOTICE SAID NOT SUITABLE FOR MICROWAVE, which we microwaved in the end.) did i mention that we use the coffee maker to make instant noodles. u shld try it, the 1st time i did it everyone was just dying, they simply could not believe their eyes but lo and behold, i've have made instant noodles from a coffee maker. this is the result of going thru 2 and a half years of life in the army BEFORE everyone started dying inside the army, reducing it to the sissfied and pussified place that it is now. THEIR FUCKING DUFFEL BAGS HAVE WHEELS ON THEM AND AN EXTENSION BAR THAT ALLOWS THEM TO ROLL THEIR BAGS ON THE FLOOR LIKE SIA GIRLS. can u imagine that. "SIR! i cannot pack my bag and go to war because the wheels are broken. and it's against the training saftey regulations to make me CARRY my duffel bag." pussified i say, absofuckinglutely pussified.

being in the staes feels like my whole world has been changed. granted, i have my hp with me and i have access to the internet and so on so forth. but it is just not the same, it's as if i'm no longer important people just because i'm not in sunny singapore. maybe that is a tad to strong but my hp has stopped ringing, emails are now CCed to me and the ratings for this blog has plummeted. i've noticed a steadt decline over the past 3 weeks that i've been here. it is simply depressing. I KNOW I AM AWAY AND IT'S NO ONE'S FAULT BUT MINE. but the scary thing is how easy people forget. granted when i was here i could not be bothered to contact the people i left behind and stuff and that's what scares me. can we maintain friendship only thru proximity and that distance does in fact play such a vital role? i've lost friends who've gone overseas but it doesnt hit home till ur the one gone. things will probably be fine once i'm back home though. it's not like i've been for for 3 months etc etc but it's a thought and not a pleasant one as thoughts go.

English, Mynmar English...

"really very sorry ... cause emotion disturbance on u... most embarrassing thing in my life ...." (at least the spelling beats mine hands down.)

a short poem.

at the same location
feeling was never the same
memory still afresh
the many times i see it
not a sweetness was tasted
there is goes again
hesitating to enter
the pain
that i feeling like now
coming from all angles i see it penetrating me



i got this 1st thing in the morning. an sms. i died. and then i died some more. my friend read it. she died too. she read it again and died laughing. linc read it. he died too. cringing and curling into a foetus on the bed with rocking with convulsions. like a mad man laughing at the rain. bitch was not informed. u shld see her trying to give the "i dun give a fucking damn what the big joke is and fine leave me outta it like i care" face.

the pain
that i feeling like now
coming from all angles i see it penetrating me

i can only imagine that that person was thinking.

Horns

bitch(the bitch in the trip) is the single most horny gal i've ever met. i swear her vagina is a virtual leaking tap of vagina fluid. it's leaking so bad, it's a wonder how she gets rid of the stains on her bed every morning... let me name the ways.

1. she has to walk into EVERY SINGLE fucking sex shop or lingire shop that we pass by.
2. er eyes light up as if she's a druggie seeing free pot laid out in front of her (with a penis that is not flacid).
3. she has tried to seduce the only other available guy on this trip, by touching his sensitive areas, hitting on him and she actually tried to get a response from him by "accidentally" touching him when they are in bed.
4. how she used to wear lingire to bed at the beginning but now sleeps in t-shirt and shorts when her charm has so obviously failed.
5. how she tries to pick up and seduce every single human being with a fucking flaming penis on the streets.
6.that when we lost her by"accident" how she waltzed into a sex shop and bought a pink corset (she has the body of a 63kg female with tits the size of a siew mai and an ass that puts j-lo to utter shame).
7. in addition she picked up a HENTAI DVD called 4days with randy AND had a nice chat with the porn shop owner for almost an hour.
8. and if that's not all she conviently gave him the telephone number of our hotel. and yes that prick actually called us up. u can just imagine the look on my face when i answered the phone and heard this guy with an american accent looking for her.
9. bitch,"OH U CALLED AT THE RIGHT TIME. I JUST GOT HOME." FUCKER (this is what i think he said,"oh goodie, let's have sex." bitch," it's so fun talking to the LOCALS instead of walking around." prick," yeah! let's FUCK." bitch,"great! so i'll stay at ur place saturaday night?" ........
10. she's not staying with us saturday night.

what a horny bitch i tell u. i hope she contracts an std.
contracts an std.
STD.
DIE.
oops, i dunno what i pressed. i ust printed it out... oh my fucking god...
better destroy it...

bitch quotes
"i'm practically single on this trip" (she has 2 sex toys in singapore and 1 more in australia.)
me," isnt that unfair to HIM(REFERING TO HER BOYFIEND WHO SHE IS CHEATING ON WITH 2 OTHER MALES.)" bitch"AFFIAR?! I'M NOT HAVING AN AFFIAR." me,"i said UNFAIR."
"i'm happy with my 63 kg body. at least i dun look like i'm 63." (THAT'S WHAT U THINK. it's what i call delusional.)
she wears hot pants and a top that is 2 sizes too small with black rebok boots.(i feel like telling her womb raider is outta fashion and she looks like a prostitute.)
she's estatic that many guys give her cat calls and smiles at her when she's in that outfit.(....)

Bomb

roller coasters are the bomb. i love the adrenaline pumping through my body everytime there is a plunge. the feel of blood rushing to ur head, the butterflys fluttering in ur stomache and the fact that ur held onto blistering metal hurtling at speeds of up to 60 km/hr by a safety belt and an iron bar. the anticipation of the plunge as you're slowly being dragged up to the apex of the curve before the plunge. i love the way they slow down the ride after a series of twists and turns, lulling u into a sense of calmness, causing ur overflexed and over tense muscles to relax. all too soon u realise that it was a deliberate ploy on the devious minds of the creators as u plunge unexpectedly into oblivion.

today i discovered the power of the speed pass. strolling past the endless queues of losers as the paitiently await their turn for the ride is simply estatic. the look of envy on their faces when they see u at the head of the queue after they had so painsaking waited for 2 hrs before reaching that very same point they u covered in 10 mins. the simple fact that i can go for the same ride twice and still see the same person in the queue. it's not a matter of money. it's a matter of perference. i feel my time is more important to me than my money. if we waited 1 and a half hrs for each ride, there is simply no way i can cover the rides there in 1 day. simple math. u reach there at 12, they close at 10. for those who have been there u know what other hidden costs there are. as long as my marginal utility is greater than my marginal cost, adrian is a happy man. considering that i can never get rides like this again unless i take a 17 hr transit flight or a 14 hr direct flight (ONE FUCKING WAY), my marginal utility is relatively high.

Bitch

i am traveling the states now as u all shld have figured out by now. with linc, hot babe by and her "BEST" friend julia, aka bitch.

bitch is the default navigator on our trip. linc cracks under pressure while by is just there. dead weight. excess baggage. MEGA EYE CANDY. and shumacher is of course driving (i am the best driver here. linc's driving is suspect. bitch cannot park. by doesnt even have a liscense, btw she's one YEAR older than me. she gets by on publuic transport and by dating guys who drive. HAHA. hint hint.)

anyway, being the "best" navigator we have, bitch has gotten damn bloody big headed recently. a PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS and a FLAMING BIG ZIT. her default target of opportunity, our most likable lincoln mah. conversations go like this. 1), hey linc, which way do we turn?" linc, "left." biatch," RIGHT!". me,"fuck....." 2) me."hey which is the best way to get there?" bitch,"we can take this this that that." linc, "we cld go by this way as well. i think it's shorter." bitch," if u think ur so smart than u navigate. since u have so many great ideas..." (to set the record straight, linc DOES have the better route. she just fucking refuses to admit it.)

bitch also got pissed at me because she fucking left her bag in my care and some other fucking fucking spilled beer onto her bag. bitch also made me go thtu some fucking heavy metal concert for 6 hrs... i almost died. apparently there were groups called MEGADETH... fucking stupid name if u ask me. if u want to say death just say it... dun be a wuss. and LIFE OF AGONY. sad mother fuckers if u ask me... and there is NEVERMORE... what kind of fucking name is nevermore. it does not make any grammatical sense that i can figure out. nevermore? are they trying to say that there is nothing more? or never going to be anything more? or they want to die right here right now? enlighten me.

apparently during rock concerts there's this thing called moshing. it's just plain fucking retarded. where people run around in circles smashing and hitting and crashing into one another. watchin what these retards were doing convinced me of the innate intelligence of the mats. no wonder they love rock concerts. no wonder they love smashing their heads around. no wonder they're so fucking stupid. doing stupid things like this and listening to heavy metal does make one stupid. i felt that i lost one too many brain cells listening to them. and a lot of mats like heavy metal. trust me. if ur not convinced that mats like heavy metal, take a walk from orchard mrt to pot black. u'll see them. in their mohocks, with their metal studded jackets and their knee high boots. fucking disgusting. most depressing. i mean stop fuicking arouind, stop getting people pregnant or robbing people or spending ur money on clothes that make u look like a prick or hanging around orchard road in the middle of the night. neither should u think that playing soccer is ur highway to tons of money and forming a mat rock band doesnt get u food on the table either.

i hate the bitch. there;s too mant things that i cant say. it's all pent up i dunno where to start. i dun have the time and energy to start.

off off and away!

i'll be going to the states today. i'm really excited about it. i'll be gone for 3 weeks without a laptop and regular internet access so i'll be back here only after my country's bloody birthday. at by's house now actually. waiting for the flight and she's gettin screwed by her mom cause we didnt book accomodation there. her mom's really dissed. i feel really bad. she's getting screwed outside and all i can do is muster eunough courage to hide inside her room...

i really do want to go out and tell her mom that that was our plan but... her mom actually got us a room at the hilton for 80 us a night. EIGHTY FUCKING US A NIGHT. a room at a motel costs us 70 us a night. and this is the god damn bloody mother fucking hilton. damn i wishe my dad had friends like this but no it is not to be.

anyways. i'll be back. later.

Me And You

I first met you hanging knickers on The line
From that moment on I knew that
There could only be one outcome
Me and you against the world forever
You have no folks
And I'm just a joke
But we made a vow that we would
Never sell each other out
A lie detector wouldn't make me
Doubt you
Now we know that it's us versus theWorld now
Me and you against the world now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shining
Just for us
Hey now, me and you against theWorld now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shiningJust for us
We hitched a ride that would turn
Out suicideI had my '45 replica gunI didn't think we'd ever need it
Didn't know he had a real one loaded
You went in firstTook the worst
Couldn't hear me shouting you to stop
Above the busy traffic passing by
We promised that together weWould die
Now we know that it's us versus the
World nowMe and you against the world now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shining
Just for us
Hey now, me and you against theWorld now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shining
Just for usI went in next took a bullet in
The chest
So I hit him with the only thing that
Was anywhere near me
A tin of baked beans and a
Woman's weekly
I got the cash picked you up and made
A dash we didn't make it too far we
Made it to the parking lot 40 cops in
Front of us...
Guess who got shot
Lying there dying in each other's arms
Oh you said to me
Don't worry about a thing my little
Sweetheart
We're together we shall never
Be apart
You took a chance on a loser like me
But you never let me down
And whether we're in heaven or hell
I know it's better than separate cells.
Now we know that it's us versus the
World now
Me and you against the world now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shiningJust for us
Hey now, me and you against the
World now
Look up there in the sky now
See the stars well they're shiningJust for us

Unluckiest Man In The Word

Oh, you brought a bright summer's day
To my gray stormy heart.
What do you think about love?
Is it such a great place to start?
I just know that this warm glow inside
Feels like an orchestra swell.
And now I know now as well.
You finally made me like myself.
Oh, you broke the hearts of a prince, a doctor, a pilot, a king.
And you fell in love with the unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.

The smallest of men, couldn't even turn you to them.
They have am morning of lucksKnow all the best clubs in town.
The latest high-fashion suits and their big flashy cars.
But just for the thrill of it if they try it on,
You kick them where it hurts and adios they're gone.
You finally made me like myself.
Oh, you broke the hearts of a lawyer, a playboy, a Georgian, a pimp.
And you fell in love with the unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
You finally made me like myself.

Oh, you broke the hearts of a prince, a doctor, a pilot, a king.
And you fell in love with the unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.T
hat's right. The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.
One more time! The unluckiest man in the whole damn world.

Yeah Yeah

i swear i'm brilliant. work is great! the people there are a tad boring. i'm working with a he-bitch. he looks like a fucking faggot. behaves like a fucking faggot. its like he shld be a woman instead of a man. he reaches the office at 645. work starts at 7. working with him is a pain. I HATE HIM. we have such different ways of doing things. plus the fact that he's so fucking afraid of trouble. he thinks the clients will get angry if they have to scope their own rice onto their plate, so he insists on scopping the rice into bowls for the clients and placing the remainder into a bowl. they were eating buffet style. HOW MANY BLOODY FUCKING BUFFETS DO U GO TO WHERE THEY SERVE U RICE IN TO A BOWL... i can think of one. buffet-faggot-he-bitch-style. he doesnt dare to pinch the food that we're going to serve to the clients. it's fucking finger food. who the hell knows if u stole ONE FUCKING FRNECH FRY... and u got to be the flaming unluckiest person in the whole wide world to get caught. period.

he has a friend. let's call him weirdo. for the simple fact that he IS werid. he says the most unsuspecting things. and he's 19 yrs old. without even an ite cert.. apparently he went to the poly and dropped out. he then took a'levels as a private canidate and didnt go for the paper... how smart is that. he has 1980 hair. floopy and long. like beverly hills 90210 hair. imagine the zoe tay acting as bobo. remember the experiment-gone-wrong hairstyle, then try to remember li nan xing's hair. yuppers. there. and that mother fucker is always trying to get dispatch duty, like he's so blatant that he wants to leave the office it's disgusting. there's a reason why they dun want to ask u to go buy things and i think it's because of the fucking blank look u show them everytime they mention a place to u u dick head. he was so happy that they asked him to deliver some document that is far away. he was like, "woah, i think they're starting to trust me." THEY ASKED U TO GO TO ORCHARD ROAD. like fucking cineleisure... wah lan aye... how hard is that. when we were asked to get dinner, they sent him to boat quay to collect part of the dinner. I HAD TO DRAW A MAP OF BOAT QUAY FOR HIM. like it's 1 fucking line. and i had to give him visual aid. NO WONDER UR SO DUMB. plus the fact that when they mentioned orchard towers he has the blurrest look on his face, he actually said i think it's in orchard road right... of course they picked me for that one! HA!

the hong kong team came to the singapore office to help out as they expect a huge workload this week. HONG KONG CHICKS RULE! this gal called crystal is so pretty. she can dress. and she talks with the sexiest hong kong accent! haha. i so wanna talk like a hongkee now. "LE HO MO? LENG ZAI! SAK BAO MEH?" and i just love the way they speak english. i actually talked to crystal for like 3o mins. HAHA. came up with some lame pick up line," hey how far is hong kong airport to hong kong city?" (this is the joey effect.) HAHAHA. which triggered a intense description of what bus to take from where, whether it's faster to take the mtr or bus. which stations are nearby with good shopping etc etc etc. i sat rght opposite her so i cld look at her without seeming suspicious. (of course i already mastered the looking at u with lookin like i'm looking at u skill.) it was wack, and the hongkee babe i was talking abt is her.

weirdo balked at buying mayonise in the city. he was like "adrian u go buy lah. i scared i cant find it and they want it fast." FUCKER. cannot get then ask me go and get. i know i'm smarter that u are but please. left without a choice and being their number one dispatch walker i left the building armed with ten dollars. i walked to 7-11 where they didnt have mayo. they called the other nearby outlets and 7-11 officially do not carry mayonise. period. oh no, the average jo might say. BUT NO, i was no average jo! i had a job to do and get it done i will. i ended up getting 10 packets of mayonise. 6 from burger king, that i walked into twice and 4 from macdonalds. HAHAHA! i'm brillant i swear! even my boss thinks so! i NEVER cease to amaze myself. i am the most amazing person i ever met! HAHAHAHA!

AMAZING ADRIAN!

if ego could provide electricity i cld power the world for a million years.

no make that a million million years.

Strategic Seating

the hottest babe from hong kong is sitting opposite me. i wish i cld take her photo. damn

Today My Brain Died

reached work at 710 today. the whole office was full. apparently i was the lastest one to arrive. i mean who the fucking hell reaches the office before 7 in the morning. hell. i didnt even have to do this in secondary school. it's just retarded.

anyway, i popped in this morning expecting to work till 7pm BUT the 1st thing my upperstudy told me was,"hey the clients cancelled. looks like its gonna be a slack day." my day was made. BUT, he had to teach me how to use the fax machine, the printer, the binder, the sticker printer (which looks like it was made in the 70s. actually i wun be suprised if it was. ANCIENT.) and that wasnt all. the phone, the door openers. (yes, i'm not kidding), the fuck man. there's just too many things.

i absorbed a cool 10%of what ever he taught me. i mean i slept at 4 and woke up at. plus, it was after saturday night... i actually claimed that i had a stomache, that ended with me staying in the toilet for a cool 20 mins. sleeping. there was nothing to do this morning since the clients didnt turn up. i ended up taking a guided day tour of raffles place (part of the countless errands that they got me to do for them, ie, buying breakfast, buying more breakfast. buying teh si... and buying things from caltex house. it was fun, the only thing was that my brain had died. i ended up walking and walking around. i got hopelessly lost and utterly unable to find whatever it is that they want me to buy. i mean who cares whether ur teh si is from that particular shop in the arcade.... fucking teh si is fucking teh si. it's just tea with milk. what is the big deal. of course i couldnt fucking be bothered whether i got it from that shop or not. teh si was teh si to me.

murphy's law. if something can go wrong it will go wrong.
of course the bloody women i bought it for could tell that it wasnt from that particular shop that she wanted. of course she made a big fuss about it, claiming that it's not as thick, as milky etc etc. of course i told her it's from her favorite stall. and fuck, i had to go get another cup and i had to tell the uncle who it was for as,"he knows what kinda teh si makes me smile." WHAT THE FUCKING HELL. TEH FUCKING CHEE BYE SI THAT MAKES U SMILE. (it actually rhymes yah? teh fucking chee bye si. come on. say it. teh fucking chee bye si!)

what was i thinking. that i could fool a fourty year old who's still single and probably never had sex in a gazillion years that a counterfeit teh si was her trusted kiss buddy she's been sucking on for the past 5 yrs...?! that the closest thing to an orgasm she's ever had is gulping down piping hot, milky and thick teh si... what does she think it is...

and i thought wrongly.. i trusted me. when the most important part of me wasnt really working. nope not my penis. my brain.

i'm suffering from joey syndrome. i swear it's from watching too much joey. but it's so damn fucking funny. his sister is just as dumb as he is. his nephew is the exact opposite from the both of them. his twisted and derranged agent and his girlfriend just sizzles. ex girlfriend now i think. i cannot even imagine what goes on in the twisted minds of the producers that churn out such good and wholesome crap. how do they take the most normal things and turn them into such works. granted i can do it spontaneously. but i cannot do it for 24 episodes and 24 mins per episode. it's like they have to have permanent constipation since they're so full of shit. did i mention his girlfriend sizzles?

JOEY,"i've done 75 love scenes, do u know how many times that has lead to actual sex?"

nephew (who's never had sex.) ," erm. 75?"

joey,"TWO HUNDRED AND FOURTY FOURTY!"

that guy has no fear of stds. i swear, he's either so fucking dumb that he doesnt know or he's just plain lucky (I KNOW IT'S JUST A SHOW. PLEASE. GIMME THAT MUCH CREDIT.). can u imagine the 6th season of joey, he finds out he has aids. now that'll be one to catch.

what's with people and putting fantastic 4 photos on their msn pics? do they think they are them? or do they want to be just like them? maybe they think that the normal person does not know that there is a fantastic 4 movie. or perhaps they idolize them, thus in a sense wanting to be them. or is it because they think that finding a picture of one of the fantastic 4 is so hard that they JUST have to get one and put it up there so that they're now in the COOL group, where just about EVER SINGLE OTHER PERSON has it too. maybe after reading this u go i put it up as my msn pic because i like it. i just want to.

ask urself WHY do u just WANT to. or what makes u FEEL LIKE IT.

what happened to all spider men, or x-men before them... star wars anyone?

Wrinkles On My Brow

i was a humdrum person.
leading a life apart
when love flew in thru my window wide
and quickened my humdrum heart
love flew in thru my window
i was so happy then
but after love had stayed a little while
love flew out again
what is this thing called love
this funny thing
called love
just who can solve
it's mystery
why should it make a fool of me
i saw you there one wonderful day
you took my heart and threw it away
that's why i asked the lord in heaven above
what is this thing called love
what is this thing called love
this funny thing called love
just who can solve it's mystery
why should it make a fool of me
i saw you there one wonderful day
you took my heart and threw it away
that's why i ask the lord in heaven above
what is this thing called love

quotes from my ever weirder circle of friends.

friend, "alright, looks like i'll just have to charm her to get her to not give me a ticket..."
me, ".............." plus the you really think that that's gonna work look.
friend, "fine, i'll just go shoot her with my sex ray then."

okay, i can just think of 1 offhand. erm... wee nee. do u know how to do something that allows me to have like a link where i can keep all my quotes...? so my blog will actually have 2 pages instead of one. come to think of it. anyone please help me. goes out to the guy with the gay blog as well. thanks peeps. (i get this naggy feelin no one is going to help me. not when i ask like this.)

In Time You Will Call Me Master

never call me when i'm driving.

"hello adrian. this is trinya from belle. i would like to know if u can start work on monday right after ur training."

me while driving and having no intention to work on monday. " yah, that's fine. great! so monday's fine."

trinya," erm... can u work on wednesday and thursday as well?"

me while driving again... "yeah that's great! i'm free..."

trinya sensing the blood of her prey homes in like a great white shark. " then what abt tues, saturday and sunday?"

dumbass driving..."yeah they're all great! i can work all those days too. so just to double check.i'm working monday, wednesday, thursday, tuesday, saturday and sunday."

notice, the fact that i repeated what ever she said IN THE SAME ORDER. this means that i was not listening to her... oh i heard her alright but i did not process it... i just said yes to what ever request she made.

trinya, "yeah that's great! i'll see u monday then."

eunice (she was sitting beside me...). "u do know that ur working the whole week yah? im only working there on thursday and maybe friday..."

me," AAAWWWWWwwwww too bad. my heart goes out to u peaches. i'm getting all the work!!! ahahaha!"

me again after stopping at the red light," that means i'm working the whole fucking bloody chee bye week!!!"

eunice, "that's what i said u bastard. and ur leaving for america on the 15th!"

me, "i know that...duh! like i need u to remind me..."

eunice,"15th july is friday... ur supposed to be working on saturday AND sunday and friday as well..."

i looked at her and started whistling a man for all seasons.

bitch. "spending too much time with u has made me feel so superior. maybe next time u shld call me master oh great one who cannot think while driving."

me in chandler's mode." it shld be mistress u bitch. maybe if u go for a sex change i might consider calling u master. otherwise just sit still and shut up. u can call ME master."

now before u start blaming me... let me say, it wasnt my fault that she called me when i was driving!!! like during the 5 hours i was in school she cldnt call me. in the 20 mins it took me to get to eunice's house she had to call me.. what the hell man... and i wasnt going to tell a person who was going to offer me a job that i cannot talk to her when i'm driving... i mean who does that!! i know, i'm started to sound like joey from friends...

read this article in 8 days... it says, gone over to the blue side. (with reference from star wars. it's how porn sounding the dialogue from star wars sound...)

1. he is here, i have felt him.

2. you cant go in there. it's restricted.

3. size matters not. judge me by my size do you. (no prizes for who said this...)

4. pull out wedge. you cant do anymore good back there!

5. do or do not. there is no try. (i personally think this is a lame attempt by 8 days at humour. besides number 1)

6. luke, at that speed, do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?

7. han! can u reach my light sabre? (this got me lying on the floor asking for more.)

8. control control. you must learn control.

9. i look forward to completing your training. in time u will call me "master". (shoot me. this is hilarious.)

10. any of chewbacca's lines.

for those of u who do not understand the lines from the 8days issues... just drop dead.

Grow Fucking Up

the most irritating guy i know. let's call him fuckface, i know it's not short or easy to type but it conveys my message across. fuckface. FUCKFACE.

okay i'm getting cold feet now cause i'm afriad he reads my blog and i'm doing this in a fit of anger... some of the things he said. i shall now say this as vauguely as i can. if he's reading this i am so bloody fucking dead. but then again when have i bothered.

imagine telling someone that A will tell him everything and not u because he's so much closer to A. and it wasnt like i wanted A to tell me anything. he just said it. maybe it's his way of striking conversation. fucking negative eq.

he willingly gives pple my msn. but refuses to give me other people's msns when i ask for them. citing x's so and so's friend u ask so and so loh... like how fucking old are u. in kindergarden. and i do not appreciate u giving my msn to other people...

there's loads more... but shall stop since my anger is satisfied.

i hate winamp. they're playing all soppy jazz love songs now...

lullaby of birdland. that's what i always hear when u sigh... i mean come on... how cheesey is that... and there's a weepy old willow. he loves to cry. and that's how i shall cry on my pillow shld u kiss me goodbye... WRONG SONG WRONG TIME.

dusty springfield's the look of love is in ur eyes... LOVE. I WLD LOVE TO STRANGLE SOMEONE NOW. the look of death perhaps... i can hardly wait to kill u. feel my arms ard u. how long i've fainted. waited just to kill u. and now i've found u. u've got the look of death on ur face. the look that time cant erase...

then there's "what is this thing called love...". shoot me... and it doesnt help since winamp is on random and like some diabolical bitch when i click next she just plays another love song... like &%$&%&$##@$%@#%.

come away with me in the night... come away with me and i will write u a death note. come away with me on a bus. i will run u down before u get on...